On Monday it was revealed Tony La Russa was arrested for DUI in February, and the Chicago White Sox knew about it before hiring him. It was his second such offense and the details don't look great for the 76-year-old manager. According to the police report, he used the "do you know who I am?" defense. It was unsuccessful.
La Russa was charged after he allegedly ran his car into a curb, The vehicle was smoking on the side of the road in the Phoenix area when officers arrived. La Russa smelled like alcohol and told the police he had been at dinner with friends. He became argumentative as he was taken into custody and refused to do a breathalyzer test or provide a sample of blood or urine. Eventually, the arresting officer obtained a warrant to take two tubes of La Russa's blood.
La Russa's first DUI came in Jupiter, Florida back in 2007.
Those are the boring details. Here are the crazy ones. ESPN's Jeff Passan tweeted an excerpt from the police report:
We'll just quote the whole thing for you since it's great:
"La Russa stated, "I had one glass of wine while at dinner with my friends." Before searching his person and placing him in the rear of my patrol vehicle La Russa asked, "Do you see my ring?" I asked La Russa what he was talking about? La Russa stated, "I'm a hall of famer baseball person." While placing him in the rear of my patrol vehicle, La Russa stated, "I'm legit. I'm a hall of famer brother. Your (sic) trying to embarrass me.""
La Russa accusing the officer of trying to embarrass him while at the same time using his fame to try and shame the guy into letting him off is just ... *chef's kiss*. There's only one person in that scenario embarrassing Tony La Russa and it's Tony La Russa.
I also love the sentence, "I'm a hall of famer baseball person." Everyone who makes it to the Hall of Fame should have to be referred to in this way moving forward. Their Wikipedia pages must immediately be changed: "Tony Gwynn was a hall of famer baseball person." It sounds like a sentence a second grader would use in a book report.