Jack Easterby is the Houston Texans executive vice president of football operations. He is on a rocket ship to the top of football after being nothing but the New England Patriots team chaplain just a few years ago. In 2017, when Sports Illustrated says Easterby was unofficially in charge of football operations in New England, he made a featured appearance at the Top youth event at Alice Drive Baptist Church in Sumter, South Carolina. Two videos of Easterby from that event are posted below. First, here's an intro to get you psyched
This first video features Easterby doing bad stand-up comedy about people in various parts of the country. Football fans in California are laid back and want to go surfing after games. "Down" in the mid-west, everyone says "don'tchaknow" over and over.
Amazingly, his most detailed bit is about Texas where everyone wears giant belt buckles, which they put their thumbs behind. The buckles are so big they need headlights and you email the belt buckle to ask permission to talk to the person wearing them. And they stomp their feet.
In New York they call you "kid" and "son" and ask what you're looking at. In Boston, where he worked at the time, they say "pahk the cah" all the time.
And in South Carolina the "sweat tea is off the chain."
I did not make up or exaggerate any of that. See for yourself.
As bad as that was, I can't tell if part two is more or less cringe. What I can tell you with 100% certainty is that Jack Easterby has got bars.