Colin Cowherd Compares Celtics to 401k, Yogurt, Wheat Thins

Colin Cowherd, King of the Metaphor
Colin Cowherd, King of the Metaphor /

Colin Cowherd returned from his week off on Monday with plenty of content fodder. He kicked things off by touching on the Boston Celtics' thorough beatdown of the shorthanded Milwaukee Bucks in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals. Cowherd's objective here was to caution everybody from getting too excited about Boston because they've been this good pretty regularly since the Larry Bird days yet have only managed one title in the last 35 years.

Cowherd then proved he didn't have any rust to shake off by comparing the Celtics to a 401k, yogurt and Wheat Thins. His point is that the Celtics, like the items listed above, are consistently fine but have very few big wins because no risks have been taken. Thus, for Cowherd to really buy into Boston, they need to show him the money and prove that they can elevate themselves above and beyond the concept of "fine"-- like the Los Angeles Lakers have in that same 35-year period.

Cowherd does have a point that the Lakers have been much better than the Celtics in the long run but it is a bit hard to make that argument right now. Los Angeles is sitting at home and a good chunk of its fanbase would undoubtedly prefer to have a team in the postseason led by two star wings, the oldest of which is 25, instead of wondering how Phil Jackson is going to screw the team over with his desire to keep Russell Westbrook around. Historically, yeah, the Lakers have been better. But Cowherd saying he'd rather be the Lakers *right now* is off the mark for sure.

Overall, though, you see where Cowherd is coming from. This is the fourth time the Celtics have made it to the Eastern Conference Finals in the last six years and yet they have no Finals appearances to show for it. Jayson Tatum and Jaylen Brown propelled their team to a hard-fought series win against the defending champs but the Bucks didn't have their second-best player. Boston is an extremely famous brand yet victory laps are being taken for winning a second-round series.

On the other hand, context is a wonderful thing! Boston took down Milwaukee despite Giannis Antetokounmpo posting literal Shaq stat lines after they spent the first half of the season looking like a play-in team. Boston has failed to reach the Finals in the last decade but never before have they made a push with a fully-realized Tatum and Brown flanked by a close-to-perfect supporting cast and a coach perfectly suited for the roster. The reason the Celtics are getting so much hype is not because they are the legendary Celtics but because they have the makeup of a great team.

Nevertheless, hats off to Cowherd for once again cooking up an insane metaphor that nobody ever considered and making a convincing enough argument that he's right. A pro's pro, this guy.