Which Teams Does The Joker Root For?


Though Joker is not out yet, the think pieces have piled up so high that an Average Joe has no hope of tackling them all, even on a picturesque and carefree fall weekend. What does this comic book movie mean for society? What is it trying to say about toxic masculinity? Is the picture even safe for audiences or will it draw the wingnuts out?

These are certainly all questions. Yet not the right question. Which sports teams does The Joker root for? You see, to defeat this maniac, we must first understand him.

Here is an honest attempt at knowing the unknowable.

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Seattle Seahawks

Our guy wasn't a big football fan growing up. Too brutish. Too low-intelligence. But the combination of Peter Carroll, Jordan Peterson, and a quarterback who is just about three percent off is a powerful draw. The Joker makes absolutely no effort to find the game if it's not televised on his area and is content to check up on the box scores. Predictably, he is insufferable with his team-oriented opinions, including that, ACTUALLY, a pass play was the right call in the Super Bowl against New England.

Brooklyn Dodgers/New York Giants

Not the Los Angeles Dodgers or San Francisco Giants. He prefers to root for two teams that no longer exist. Why? Because life was purer back in the 1940s and 1950s. Men could be men. Advanced analytics weren't even a blip on the radar. Instead of following the sport like most normies, he fulfills his itch with coffee table books and selected segments of Ken Burns' Baseball documentary featuring Roy Campanella, Duke Snider, and Bobby Thompson.

Against the Women's National Soccer Team/For the Men's Team

Pretty self-explanatory.

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Dallas Mavericks

It's not because of the Dirk Nowitzki/Steve Nash combination, though that certainly helped. It's because of Mark Cuban. The Joker is a huge Cuban stan, celebrates his entire body of work: from Shark Tank to causing pure chaos on the sidelines. Sees him as a role model actually.

Rafael Nadal

One of his weirdest quirks is his affinity for tennis. You'd think he'd hate a sport where the spectators need to sit silent and follow rules. But for some reason, the back-and-forth nature really scratches him where he itches. What he does not enjoy is all the regular people just assuming he roots for Novak Djokovic just because of the Djoker nickname. Do they not understand there can be only one? What must he do to make them understand?

Texas v Baylor
Texas v Baylor / Ron Jenkins/Getty Images


The Air Raid offense has always intrigued him, though his fandom has waned since the university cut ties with Art Briles. Now he's considering jumping on the Liberty bandwagon. He'll always be loyal to the hoops team, though, what with those bright uniforms.