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The Bowl Game: NFL Coaches We'd Like to See Get Slimed

Kyle Koster
Rich Fury/KCA2021/GettyImages
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If We Were Vampires by Jason Isbell is the perfect song ... My prediction for the Final Four: five Big Ten teams ... This isn't your older brother's Wisconsin ... Perhaps it's a bit extreme, but anyone who brings up analytics solely to complain about the existence of analytics deserves to be in jail ... There are volume shooters and then there's Antony Edwards ... People are way more interested in dancing on the ceiling in music than they are in real life ... Jeopardy now publishing daily box scores: What is a very good idea ... Has anyone ever won 700 games more quietly than Oregon's Dana Altman .... David Culley's fireable offense was being hired by the Houston Texans ... Never thought we'd see the day when Sidney Crosby wasn't an NHL All-Star ... In news straight out of 1993: The Bulls and Suns would be the No. 1 seeds if the NBA season ended today ... Novak Djokovic is the Novak Djokovic of having his visa revoked ... Giannis Antetokounmpo is suddenly doing a lot of Giannis Antetokounmpo things ... The New York Knicks refuse to stop until they assemble the entire 2019 Duke team at Madison Square Garden ... Looking forward to them losing to Michigan State in the Elite Eight ...

Jake Paul was scammed on his $3.5 million purchase of rare Pokemon cards, discovering G.I. Joe cards inside instead .... It's a bummer because right up to that point, it was a prudent financial investment ... Saw an article in the New York Post explaining why the New York Yankees need to relax their facial hair rules ... Can you even imagine the type of content we'll be getting if this work stoppage stretches into May ... Given the choice between hearing about your fantasy team or your Wordle, I think I'd choose the former ... Colin Cowherd's podcast network is now going head-to-head with Fox Sports' podcast network ... How is that going to work ... If CNN is so concerned about right-wing disinformation, perhaps giving those responsible for spreading it cushy jobs as contributors isn't the best way to show it ... How To With John Wilson is the rare show that gives you a buzz ... Mike McCarthy said he'd be willing to get slimed if Dallas wins the Nickelodeon game this weekend ... Had never thought about it before, but here are the seven NFL coaches who it'd be most satisfying to see covered in green goo: 7. Rich Bisaccia ... 6. Sean McVay ... 5. Dan Campbell ... 4. Bill Belichick ... 3. Mike Tomlin ... 2. Ron Rivera .. 1. Andy Reid

It seems pretty clear at this point: Jim Harbaugh is either going to jump to the NFL or he's not ... NFTs made me nostalgic for simpler times when you could simply switch seats on the bus if someone tried to sell you invisible goods ... Getting a Toblerone bar and walking around the airport with it still feels like the height of luxury ... Good Charlotte absolutely goes as hard as you remember ... What kind of odds can I get on Eric Adams finishing his term as mayor of New York City ... Getting dangerously close to unironically rooting for Coach K to win a title in his farewell season ... Shoutout to ESPN's Kevin Connors for championing the little guy ... Speaking of little guys: how about Foster Loyer at Davidson ... Go ahead and pencil the Wildcats into your Sweet 16 ....

14 Peaks on Netflix is spellbinding ... In five years' time, literally every NBA team from the 1980s and 1990s will have its own documentary ... Recently discovered that the Boris Johnson haircut is actually quite popular among British politicians ... How the hell did that happen ... In terms of describing what it is, pour over coffee is elite ... A lot of Viagara-related chatter before Bills-Pats ... The rare game everyone can get up for ... Have said it before and will say it again: Trent Dilfer is a tremendous podcast guest ... Peter Schrager too ... What they both have in common is an ability to translate a tremendous amount of information into layman's terms ... Hurts to admit it: the Detroit Red Wings may not be a playoff team after all ... They don't get the fanfare of the Lions and Browns, but pound-for-pound the Vikings franchise is as big of a mess as any ... Did any of you sickos actually allow lurching in Super Tecmo Bowl ... A vile practice ...

A recent poll suggests Americans read 12.6 books per year ... Don't think I've seen a bigger lie in a long time ... Where was the local media on all the crazy stuff happening at Willy Wonka's chocolate factory ... Stat that hardly seems real but is: Tom Izzo has 30 career wins over Michigan ... Speaking of Michigan: Juwan Howard will really have to earn his money this year ... Another few mediocre weeks and the NCAA Tournament will be in doubt ... At least five percent of Home Improvement episodes revolved around Tim Taylor not finding out the result of the big game he had taped ... Not nearly enough ... Have been ripping through old Full House episodes following the death of Bob Saget ... They just don't make 'em like that anymore ...

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