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Roundup: Alison Brie Engaged, Donald Trump vs. Everybody, Big Ben's Clock is Ahead, Curt Schilling's

WASHINGTON, DC - AUGUST 29: U.S. President Donald Trump heads back to the Oval Office after attending an event establishing the U.S. Space Command, the sixth national armed service, in the Rose Garden at the White House August 29, 2019 in Washington, DC. Citing potential threats from China and Russia and the nation’s reliance on satellites for defense operations, Trump said the U.S. needs to launch a 'space force.' U.S. Air Force Gen. John Raymond will serve as the first head of Space Command, which will have 87 active units handling operations such as missile warning, satellite surveillance, space control and space support. (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

Alison Brie is engaged to James Franco’s brother, Dave … Donald Trump vs. Fox News enters its second round … The incredible storyof a season stolen from one of New Orleans’ top high school football teams by Hurricane Katrina … Working with too many men is bad for women’s health … London’s Big Ben has been running six seconds fast …West Ham striker arrested on suspicion of making threats to kill and witness intimidation … Rugby player arrested after confrontation over parking space … Cheerleading coach forced to resign over racist shirt …Young Ohio State fan worried heart device will make him root for Michigan … Another setback for those who want to legalize sports gambling in New Jersey …Curt Schilling’s long and ugly history of insensitivity toward Muslims … Don Orsillo won’t return to Red Sox broadcasts next year.

NEW YORK, NY - MAY 04:  Alison Brie attends the "China: Through The Looking Glass" Costume Institute Benefit Gala at the Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 4, 2015 in New York City.  (Photo by Larry Busacca/Getty Images)
"China: Through The Looking Glass" Costume Institute Benefit Gala - Arrivals | Larry Busacca/Getty Images

Obama wants you, geeks. [Fast Company]

Tough break for the Dallas Cowboys as Orlando Scandrick tears his ACL. [Cowboys News]

Dan Rather interviewed/stuck up for The Fat Jew. [BroBible]

A quick-thinking woman had a simple solution when informed she couldn’t bring her expensive bottle of cognac aboard a flight. [Yahoo]

Boise State claimed it did not know about Sam Ukwuachu’s physical abuse of ex-girlfriend, did know he was diagnosed with major depressive disorder [ESPN]

Chris Christie wrote an essay about Bruce Springsteen that would fit right in with sportswriters. [Uproxx]

All those Justin Bieber hits don’t just happen by accident. [New York Times]

Hey, what’s Adnan from Serial up to? Still trying to get out of jail. [Vice]

Vengeful woman keys “wore” into parked cars, could use a spelling lesson. [NYDN]

Hayden Rettig won Rutgers starting quarterback job because Chris Laviano was caught with a fake ID. [Asbury Park Press]

Pat Robertson (remember him?) says Monday’s roller coaster day on Wall Street was Planned Parenthood’s fault. [Politics USA]

More Donald Trump, this time ejecting a Univision anchor from a press conference.

Will Ferrell discusses his 63-pitch arsenal, which includes a European knuckle ball.

Awkward 12-year-old boy trips, jabs hand through a 350-year-old Italian painting worth $1.5 million.

So. Many. Kangaroos.

Just a slew of hockey trick shots because why not?

Like it was going to be anything except Fall Out Boy for the first roundup.