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Ranking NFL QBs By How Much You Want to Drink With Them Is Important Work

Kyle Koster
Carmen Mandato/GettyImages
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We live in the golden age of ranking stuff and future generations may never truly understand how much of our society revolves around capricious and arbitrary sorting. This leaves people with two choices: either attempt to decipher what it all means and what it says about the 2022 lived experience or simply sit back and enjoy the content. The latter is surely more fun than the former.

Which brings us to a high-quality tiering project unveiled on Twitter yesterday by Willie Lutz, who separated NFL quarterbacks into tiers based on how many beers he would like to have with them. And he pretty much nailed it.

A few minor quibbles. Tom Brady's allure and documented beer-drinking prowess is self-evident. But one wonders if he'd try to convert you to something after the fourth or fifth drink. Seems like the type of person who doesn't leave a high-top without a seed-investment promise in hand. For that reason, I would bump him down to Tier Two and call up Aaron Rodgers. Green Bay's superstar is a handful yet his range of conversation is unmatched. You wouldn't necessarily agree with all of his theories; it'd be tremendous fun to hear them. Toss in a few pre-drink gummies and see where the night takes you.

Derek Carr doesn't do a tremendous amount for me personally, so he might be too high. Whereas Lamar Jackson feels like a total wild-card with real Tier One or Tier Two potential. Hearing his honest takes on the constant criticisms he faces could be really fun. Matt Ryan is also a good hang if I've ever seen one.

Russell Wilson has to be on the bottom line here, and honestly Kirk Cousins and Sam Darnold are undervalued.

But all in all, an important document for us to study. Some plugged-in reporter should probably endeavor to make this experiment become a real-world reality and share their findings. It might tank their ability to get such access ever again yet good content is worth suffering for.

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