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Local Blogger Named Sausage King of Detroit, Presented With Lavish Meat-Based Tribute by Pistons

Kyle Koster
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The Detroit Pistons have the second-worst record in the NBA but at least they are trying. Like every other team in the city, perhaps they'll achieve the impossible dream of achieving a winning record three years down the road. Yay?

Anyway, it's been a rough campaign. All worth it, though, this week as the team finally did the right thing and properly recognized the heroic eating habits of Andy Isaac, a local blogger who dreamed a big dream and posted his way into unlimited free encased meats for a year.

Isaac tweeted out a vague threat and demands to be met with a red carpet and balloons upon his arrival to the Charlotte Hornets game on Tuesday and the organization had no choice but to placate him, given the considerable influencing power of his fingertips.

Truly inspirational stuff. Even more life-affirming given Isaac's vow to share the goodness with fellow Pistons fans next season.

Folks, it's not lost on us that so much of the news that finds its way to this here website is scandalous or depressing. But Isaac's insatiable appetite and the Pistons' transparent attempt to create good PR? Well, that's some delicious goodness to bite into.

All hail Detroit's new sausage king.

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