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The Bowl Game: Nick Saban Fixed the Death Star

Kyle Koster
Steve Limentani/ISI Photos/GettyImages
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The Detroit Lions have either won or tied half of their last four games. Peaking at the right time. * Michigan's Aidan Hutchinson: the toughest dude to ever be named Aidan. * The overuse of the term egregious is becoming a bit egregious. * Bears fans sat for three hours in 34-degree temperatures and driving sleet to watch Andy Dalton sling the rock. Football will outlive the cockroaches. * Neither of Michigan's quarterbacks from the Big Ten championship game were alive when Tom Brady was drafted by New England. * Anyone not rooting for Cincinnati against Alabama should be on a watchlist . * NFL Films should enlist David Attenborough to narrate all highlights of George Kittle running in the open field. *

Pitt quarterback Kenny Pickett's fake slide was one of the coolest touchdowns runs you'll ever see. It was also a move that should be immediately outlawed. * Mike Gundy coming up inches short in a legacy-defining game. Who saw that coming? * This is one of the most confusing and open NFL seasons in recent memory. And that was before Russell Wilson started getting ideas. * The Charlotte Hornets might just be ready to win right now. * Legends of the Fall should have been about football. * Every time I catch Football Night in America, I'm genuinely surprised to see Tony Dungy. His agent is worth every penny. * Tom Wamsgans can certainly take a punch. * Kyle Whittingham might be the best coach in America. * It's not that the Utah Utes want to beat you. It's that they want to steal your soul. *

Brent Venables
Tyler Smith/GettyImages

Oklahoma is reportedly hiring longtime Clemson defensive coordinator Brent Venables. Where was the Tigers' getback coach on that one? * Dabo Swinney: Losing his binkie. * John Harbaugh going for two to win it in regulation is why he's the best coach in the NFL. * Not sure Patrick Mahomes is Patrick Mahomes again. Not sure it matters the way that defense is playing. * The Super Bowl still goes through Kansas City. * Did you see who is playing in the Barstool Bowl? Saturdays really are for the Boise. * Michigan State-Pitt in the Peach Bowl. Bound to be a Narduzzi. * Northern Illinois quarterback Rocky Lombardi looks like one of the Dazed & Confused guys after a summer spent logging in the Yukon. * Mario Cristobal is either going to be the next coach at Miami or he isn't. *

Don't look now but the Detroit Red Wings have won five straight and would be in the NHL playoffs if they started today. * Meanwhile, the New York Islanders have dropped 11 in a row. Might be time to panic. * Started re-watching Mad Men. Has there ever been a better pilot episode? * Attended a minor-league hockey game where they shot hot dogs out of a hot dog cannon during a stoppage in play. No thanks. * Alabama went up to Seattle and thumped Gonzaga. They were feeling their Oats. * We say it every 10 years in college basketball. Purdue has the horses to win it all. * Matt Painter: under-appreciated. * Joel Klatt repeatedly hammered home the idea that Iowa's strategy was to punt all the time. Never a good sign. * Jenny Taft: The All-American girl is having an All-American girl of her own. Congratulations. Parenting is the hardest and most rewarding thing a person ever gets to do. Except, of course, sit between Skip and Shannon. * After all that, Alabama is the top seed in the tournament. Who saw that coming, besides everyone? * Nick Saban deserves his own Hall of Fame. * Nick Saban does two things: eat oatmeal creme pies and destroy worlds. And not in that order. *

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