I Think Matthew Stafford Is Just Selling His House

Kyle Koster
Leon Halip/Getty Images
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Matthew Stafford's magnificent house is now on the market. Located in beautiful Bloomfield Township, it can be yours for $6.5 million. One of the first thoughts that came to my mind while browsing vicariously on Redfin was the mansion's proximity to water. Having small children of my own, and knowing that the Staffords are stuffed to the gills with them as well, a natural nervousness was triggered.

Then I saw Kelly Stafford's Instagram post explaining why the couple is making such a real estate decision:

"“No speculation is needed. We’re about to have our fourth child, and I, personally, do not want to live on a lake or have a pool with four children under the age of a little over three. So that is the reason that it’s on the market. It makes us super sad. That house has been incredible. We’ll never own a house like it. So it is a super sad thing, but it just makes us feel better knowing that there’s no real dangers of having tiny ones running around all the bodies of water. So, that is the reason.”"

For those of you who aren't familiar media ecosystem here, the basic order of operations is this:

1. The Staffords do something

2. Plugged-in beat guys report it without making it a big thing

3. National media catches on and speculates wildly

4. Local guys helpfully explain why there's probably not any smoke to this fire, usually while pointing out the albatross of a cap hit the Lions would take if they traded Stafford

5. Rinse

6. Repeat

Right now, I think we are in Step 4 of the process with better Lions minds than my own explaining that this situation is slightly different than the Tom Brady one last year. Yes, the then-Patriot put his house up for sale and, months later, bolted for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

Brady was 41 years old and the final year of his contract. Stafford is 32 with three left on his. The former had a bit more agency in his ultimate destination. The latter would have likely seen his replacement taken third overall in last month's NFL Draft if the plan was to move on. Insert your own supporting point here.

Anyway, the last big rumor that Stafford was pushing for a trade turned out to be a dud after his wife squashed it. This is going to end the same way. Count me among the naive if I get burned, but it really seems like this house business is much ado about nothing.

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