London Mayor Enjoying Semi-Naked Women Playing Olympic Beach Volleyball

Stephen Douglas

As I write these words there are semi-naked women playing beach volleyball in the middle of the Horse Guards Parade immortalised by Canaletto. They are glistening like wet otters and the water is plashing off the brims of the spectators’ sou’westers. The whole thing is magnificent and bonkers.

Again, I don’t know what a lot of those words mean, but the description of the “semi-naked women” “glistening like wet otters” should be bookmarked and used as a pickup line on spring break. Party on, Boris Johnson.