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Leave Jerry Seinfeld's Apartment Alone, You Nerds

By Stephen Douglas
The Final Shooting Days Of Seinfeld
The Final Shooting Days Of Seinfeld / David Hume Kennerly/Getty Images
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Jerry Seinfeld's apartment from the popular 90's sitcom Seinfeld could not phyiscally exist according to a Redditor who did the science. User PixelMagic uploaded an image showing how the hallway outside Jerry's apartment would have had to run right through the kitchen. This has been upsetting to some people for some reason, but not for me. I'm not mad. Please don't put in your blog post about this that I'm mad.

Of all the things that could possibly ruin a television show, this is not one of them. See, I've been aware that Seinfeld was taped on a stage in front of a live studio audience since I was a child.

In the sixth season there is a two-part episode called "The Highlights of 100." It begins by Jerry entering his apartment from the physically impossible hallway which is actually just backstage on a television set and speaks to the audience. Upon entering the apartment, Jerry looked directly at me, a person in my own home, and appeared to talk directly to me about previous episodes. It was wild.

This stuck with me for a few years until the night of the finale when they aired another clip show which featured a montage set to Green Day's "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)." Again Jerry began the episode by speaking directly to the audience through a fourth wall that definitely would have needed to exist if his apartment was real. That's when something really strange happened. If you go to The Clip Show on Hulu, you will see a bald man appear around the 41-minute mark. He looked a lot like Frank Costanza's lawyer, and even though he didn't speak, he sounded like George Steinbrenner. Then more strangers and cameras started to appear. That's when it hit me. This television show I was watching was a television show. My life would never be the same.

And that brings me to today when someone pointed out on Reddit that Jerry's apartment couldn't exist. The only problem is, it did. It still does. Inside the Internet where every single thing that happens in the world is immediately compared to Seinfeld by some sick, broken mind.

Jerry Seinfeld's apartment exists in reruns and syndication and expensive streaming rights. I can see it right now if I want. It's across the hall from the apartment where Kramer had a giant hot tub and a 30-second run from Newman's if you're a rooster. It's as real as you or I.

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