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The New York Islanders Are In Big Trouble Because There Are No NBA Games to Overreact to Today

By Stephen Douglas
New York Islanders v Tampa Bay Lightning - Game Five
New York Islanders v Tampa Bay Lightning - Game Five / Mike Carlson/Getty Images
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The Tampa Bay Lightning crushed the New York Islanders on Monday night, 8-0. The Lightning took a 3-2 series lead and since there were no NBA playoff games last night we have to discuss how the Islanders will never win the big one and their best players have forever tarnished their legacy and whoever their coach is will probably be fired very soon.

Look, we're not alone. Get Up was forced to discuss the Islanders game this morning as Damien Woody pointed out that the Jets once lost to the Patriots in the regular season, but then beat the Patriots in the playoffs. The fact that the Jets were eliminated a week after that is besides the point.

Not quite as hot take-y as we like so let's go in on Islanders star Mathew Barzal, who is missing a T in his name and could potentially miss Game 6 as well. During the second period he crosschecked Jan Rutta and earned a game misconduct penalty. Barzal, whom I've been assured is the Islanders best player, could be suspended. This is not Brazal's first incident like this according to the New York Post. It's hard to imagine a team can win a Stanley Cup with Barzal leading them. That's why I'm here to say that Mathew Barzal is clearly the Ben Simmons of the NHL.

As for the rest of the Islanders, Jordan Eberle led New York in ice time, but only managed three shots in 16:29. I would assume he should be taking four or five times as many shots. Not to mention Eberle didn't win a single faceoff. He really needs to step up if the Islanders are going to have a chance.

Maybe the worst part is that New York has gotten nothing from Mark Bavaro this series. One handsome lad said that hockey diehards were worried when Bavaro was plugged into the midstickman position so late in the season, and it looks like those fears have finally come to fruition as Bavaro has not touched the ice in the series.

And yet the Islanders remain a Pete Ing Theory candidate. Peter Ing appeared in three games for the '93-'94 Detroit Red Wings. The season after Ing left they made the Stanley Cup Final. Compare that to John Tavares signing with the Toronto Maple Leafs after the '17-'18 season. Since then the Islanders have been to the second round and two conference finals. It is a fact that no team has ever been as much of a Pete Ing Theory candidate as the '20-'21 Islanders.

Not to mention you never bet against Barry Trotz in an elimination game. Ever. Unless you want to because outside the Capitals Stanley Cup run in '18, he's only won two other playoff series in two decades. So, actually, yeah, feel free to bet against Trotz.

Meanwhile, Steven Stamkos continues to solidify his legacy like Kevin Durant. Stamkos had two goals, one assist, one SM(?) and won seven of 11 faceoffs. If the Islanders don't come up with an answer for Stamkos, they're doomed.

In fact, if the Islanders lose to the Lightning in Game 6 at home, well, they might as well move. Just never even play at the Nassau Coliseum ever again. Don't bother. I know it sounds like the ultimate overreaction and it would never happen in a million years, but if they lose tomorrow they should just lock the the doors on the way out and find a new home.

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