If the NBA Resumes Play at Disney World, They Need to Film Some Reality Shows Too

Magic Johnson and Mickey Mouse
Magic Johnson and Mickey Mouse / Handout/Getty Images
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With the possibility that the NBA could resume their season in some form on the Disney World property in Florida, a whole slew of other opportunities could present themselves. If the league is going to be in a place like this (isolated and surrounded by camera crews) they might as well optimize profitability. Most productions are shut down indefinitely during the pandemic, but if the NBA can really get this off the ground then they have so many opportunities to shoot possible reality shows to incorporate. Here are some of the best options.

MasterChef

This is my personal favorite idea and something that should actually happen. Some of the other entries here are jokes, but this one is completely serious. Each NBA team's active roster is roughly the size of a MasterChef team at the start of a season. If these guys are really going to be sequestered to Disney World you will have multiple industrial kitchens at your disposal.

You can do a team competition where they take turns feeding the rest of the league. Or every team can nominate their best player cooks to represent the franchise. You fly in Gordon Ramsey and the rest falls into place as Kenny Atkinson sits home and watches Gordon argue with Kyrie Irving about whether chicken really needs to be cooked at all or if it's just a societal construct.

Ink Master

Dave Navaro, Dennis Rodman, and Carmen Electra host. You could either bring in working tattoo artists or use players interested in learning. Either way you have many human canvases.

The Bachelorette

No-brainer. Every player who is not married can compete for the heart of someone. No one from the Kardashian cinematic universe need apply. You could shoot a season a week for as long as this lasts. Ernie Johnson can host.

The Voice

It's just Victor Oladipo singing while John Legend and Blake Shelton sit in chairs at a safe distance. Appearance fees alone will negate any and all profits the league was set to make with some kind of postseason tournament, but think of the ratings!

Big Brother

The Real World features people leaving the house so that's out. Big Brother, on the other hand, is perfect. Just without people getting voted out of the house. It's really more Big Brother After Dark. People sit around and talk and drink and wear pajamas and consider going to bed. Look, these can't all be slam dunks.

Shark Tank

Mark Cuban will already be there. Michael Jordan loves sitting in comfortable chairs and throwing away money so he's a natural shark. The other regular sharks would probably like to be involved, but if they can't then you've got other owners or someone like LeBron who could rotate into the other spots. Every player wants to be a brand so they have plenty to sell.

Project Runway

James Harden and Russell Westbrook in the traditional Tim Gunn and Heidi Klum roles, but also as contestants. And models. And producers.

Kawhi Leonard Yule Log Channel

Just put Kawhi Leonard in a Fort Wilderness room with a fireplace. No bed. Just a sensible chair next to the fire, opposite a camera. No, the feed will not be on a loop.