Dallas Cowboys Reach Peak Abhorrence to Keep Butt's Warm

Jerry Jones probably loves this article.
Jerry Jones probably loves this article. / Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports

The Dallas Cowboys are America's team...to hate.

Unless you're a Cowboys fan, you really can't stand the Cowboys can you? From their instance that they remain the most important NFL team in existence to a fan group that acts like they're relevant in the Super Bowl conversation despite being irrelevant in that convo for over two decades, the Cowboys are a team so many love to hate, including myself.

Today, we got another reason.

To keep their butts warm, the Cowboys shipped in their own benches for their game against Washington today. They are the only team to do so.

Why would they do it? Gotta keep their butts warm.

Earlier this week, Mike McCarthy guaranteed a win over Washington. Now this? Can the Cowboys get any more abhorrent?

I guess the Cowboys really need to have warm butts to win this game. Or perhaps they believe Washington will have a competitive advantage from having warm butts while they sit in the cold.

Whatever the reason, these seats won't make a difference. What will is if Ezekiel Elliott can run the ball effectively and if Dak Prescott can throw a few touchdowns and limit turnovers. But yeah, charter a transport plane to bring these bad boy botty-warming benches in. That'll make a difference.