Bruce Allen Used a Guest Appearance on MMQB to Kiss His Boss Daniel Snyder's Butt

Allen used this platform to basically let us know that he is a grumpy old white guy, and that he is willing to kiss his boss, Daniel Snyder’s, butt. This is Allen on Snyder:

"Today, I’m constantly impressed by the active, non-stop, brilliantly quick and witty mind of Dan Snyder. There is no better example of America being the land of opportunity than Dan’s story — a boy growing up rooting for his favorite team each Sunday alongside his hard-working father, then becoming owner of that team and striving for a championship for the fans and community."

That paragraph immediately followed the one where he talked about his former bosses, the Glazer family. He described the Glazers as “the leading experts in sports franchise ownership” thanks to also owning Manchester United. He tells us that the owners who had one of the lowest payrolls in the NFL while the cap rules were being adjusted, and did not have enough coaches to function if they fired Raheem Morris before the season ended, “have a burning desire to win on the field.”

Thanks for the insight, there, Bruce. Bruce Allen has had long time ties to the league thanks to his father, and the one entertaining nugget was a story about Halas, who taught him his first curse word, “Packers.” A guest piece where he just related stories from the league and its colorful characters could have been worthwhile. Instead, for the rest of this advertisement, we found out that Bruce Allen thinks players who used to play for his father or were former Redskins would be his choice for the Hall of Fame (without explanation as to why), that he loves the Redskins, that he wants the Redskins to win, and that he loves America. He also does not like staying up late and just like others that frequent buffets at 5 p.m. for the senior discount thinks Monday Night Football should start earlier and we shouldn’t have names on the back of jerseys.

It is at least good to know that Allen would move the kickoff back to the 40-yard line. “All of this talk about eliminating the kickoff is nonsense. The only question — why was the kickoff ever moved from the 40-yard line?”

That’s a good question, indeed. Wait . . . when was the kickoff ever at the 40-yard line?

This fluffy MMQB appearance by a current league executive merits a Good Job, Good Effort.

[photo via US Presswire]