No One Could Move Sub Sandwiches Like Scottie Pippen

Kyle Koster

Many of you watched the Michael Jordan documentary last night so you can tell me if my assumption is wrong here, but I'm guessing not near enough time was devoted to Scottie Pippen's 1989 Mr. Submarine commercial. And that's a damn shame because it is a magnificent artifact of a lost time.

Equal parts informative, appetizing, and unnerving, a young Pippen encounters a six-foot party sub standing on end and calls for enforcements in Kim and Cheryl, two of the Luvabulls. They then go criss-cross applesauce on the ground and dig into that bad boy like the next meal will never come.

Bound to leave your mouth watering and your head shaking, here is the commercial, which still rules.

Did Pippen need to dunk a smaller sandwich? No. But are you glad he did. Well, you should be.

Mr. Submarine may have had a very professional name, but let no one assume he couldn't let his permed hair down very once in a while.