Royals Fan Offers to Get Players Faces on Unicorn Bodies Tattooed on His Butt if They Get Him Ticket

By Jason Lisk

World Series tickets are currently going for a buttload in Kansas City, thanks to a 29 year absence from Fall Classic. One Chicago-area Royals fan would literally pay with his butt cheeks if given an opportunity to go to the game, according to Red Eye Chicago. Jeremy Scheuch, 35 years old, has come up with several designs of Royals’ players faces on unicorn bodies (or in Mike Moustakas’ case, on a moose) that he is willing to tattoo on his butt in exchange for tickets.

"Scheuch, the general manager of Do312, has been tweeting his design at Royals stars like Butler, Eric Hosmer and Jeremy Guthrie in an effort to get their attention, offering to get their faces tattooed on his gluteus maximus if they’ll hook him up with a pair of World Series tickets. Scheuch even offered to let Guthrie pick the butt cheek that the tattoo will go on."

"So, um, why would he do that?"

"“Because it’s the World Series,” he said. “I’ve been waiting 29 years. I need to go with my dad.”"

All of this has me thinking that we will be seeing the selling of live organs outside Wrigley Field when the Chicago Cubs get to a World Series.