Tom Brady moving into Derek Jeter's old mansion ... Layoffs at Chicago's The Score ... The 100 craziest moments of Tiger King ... No matter how long this quarantine lasts I refuse to make my own bread ... The real reason there is a toilet paper shortage ... Andy Reid is working out of his basement ... Chicago has a new police superintendent ... Seinfeld OTB episode gets its due ... Let's check in on Amazon to see how they're going to message all this ... Pittsburgh scientists believe their coronavirus vaccine will be fast-tracked ... Federal government should have those checks to you in the next five months, don't worry ... Looking forward to the Oh, Hello podcast on Princess Diana ... Joe Exotic hospitalized ... Bad luck for those who invested in Luckin Coffee ... Why you should bank on Lamar Jackson winning another MVP this year ... Gotta be way easier to sell the whole hand-washing thing to kids when you're Maui ... Dr. Fauci says everyone should be under a stay-at-home order ...
Candace Owens considering a run for office, obviously. [Fox News]
Incredible idea to have comedy writers sketch out a hypothetical coronavirus episode. [Vulture]
Every NFL team's best first-round draft pick since 2010. [Bleacher Report]
There are only three patients on the big floating hospital on the Hudson. [New York Times]
Mike Francesa is upset that @BackAftaThis has made him so popular. [The Big Lead]
This is not recommended.
Fountains of Wayne -- All Kinds of Time