Which NFL Coach Is Texting Into the Pat McAfee Show Instead of Watching Film?

Kyle Koster

The NFL gave the go-ahead for teams to use pre-recorded crowd noise this season. It's capped at 70 decibels. Pat McAfee and his staff tried to contextualize — and probably understand themselves — just how loud that is on today's show, which led a well-placed source to text in with some inside intel.

Alright, so the fake sound feels louder than a normal crowd. Louder than you'd think. But not loud enough to impact the snap count. They never turn it down. Music layered on top of the never-ceasing din sounds awful.

We'd never know all this if whichever NFL coach reached out was watching film instead of McAfee content, a sliding-doors situation the host himself addressed.

Who could it have been? My personal money is on the most handsome NFL frontman of them all. You know the one I'm talking about. Him.

We may never know the real answer. But it's certainly worth remembering the next time one of those glowing profiles of a coach who eats All-22 in his office 17 hours a day is published. Perhaps the protagonist could go home earlier and actually see his children if they chose not to catch irreverent simulcasts in real-time.