Why Are These NBA Throwback NFL Jerseys So Deeply Unsettling?

Kyle Koster
Larry Stewart
Larry Stewart / Brian Bahr/Getty Images

We'll never run out of things because we can always combine one thing with other things to create a new thing. And if that sentence didn't make sense to you, brace yourself for something else liable to rattle you to the very core. A Twitter account I have previously not engaged with sent out NBA throwback-inspired NFL jerseys and a co-worker made me look at it. As a result, a deeply unsettling feeling, like when you realize you've locked your keys inside the car, washed over me.

These are horrific! Not the photoshopping and design work, to be clear. And not the work to put this idea out into the universe. I'm talking about the actual look of these things. That Houston one, in particular, sends a chill up the spine.

Under no circumstances is anyone allowed to produce these in real life. Or show my co-worker what other NFL divisions might look like. Am I overreacting? Maybe. But every so often a visceral reaction pops up that must be dealt with in public. Thanks for indulging.