Minnesota State Senator Doesn't Want Legal Weed Because Police Dogs Will Have to Retire

Stephen Douglas
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Minnesota State Senator John Jasinski is fighting against the legalization of marijuana in his state. In doing so he's actually fighting for the right of dogs to work. Jasinski, into a microphone, in front of television cameras, said that the legalization of marijuana would result in the early retirement of drug-sniffing dogs and called this a "big issue."

The good news is that a retired dog is just a dog. And most dogs do not have jobs. In fact, it's quite rare for a dog to have a job of any kind. You've got your service dogs and your police dogs and the dogs who retrieve bats at minor league baseball games, but other than that the dog unemployment rate has to be hovering around 99.9 percent for about the hundredth consecutive year. Or however long they've been keeping track of these kinds of statistics at the U.S. Department of Dog Labor -- which actually sounds like an awesome place to work with all the puppies they must have there.

Dogs who have been trained to sniff for drugs can literally just go back to being dogs. They already live somewhere, they just don't have to get up and get dressed in the morning anymore. No longer having to wrestle with this decision every morning will be a great relief for any pooch.

Retired dogs are not a problem. Besides, they can technically just start their own private security business.

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