Mike Greenberg Eats His Burger With a Knife and Fork

Kyle Koster

Mike Greenberg is the engine that makes Get Up run and is arguably ESPN’s most skilled point guard when it comes to the combined television and radio realm. And it’s genuinely cool that he’s found so much success in a new role following the Great Schism of the Mikes. Now that those pleasantries are out of the way, on to more pressing Greeny matters …

Greenberg leaned into the fastidious and cultured role when paired opposite Mike Golic. That dynamic proved to be an incredible formula and worked because it was only slightly exaggerated. To see him eating a burger with a knife and fork, combined with the impossible-to-process knowledge it takes him three bites to consume a single grape really drives home the fact that, yeah, he’s like that off air, too.

Now, normally I wouldn’t make it my business to make a direct appeal to another man’s wife, but since she shared this main course photo, it seems fair to ask her what else this guy is up to come meal time.

At this point, everything would be believable. Hearing he flips his bagel halves around so the smooth sides are on the outside wouldn’t throw me. Or finding out that he’s a chronic spork user. As a big Seinfeld guy, perhaps there’s a similar fork-and-knife method for eating a candy bar — an homage to the trailblazing Mr. Pitt.

On the other hand, maybe it’s all left to the imagination. Maybe the true excitement is in the possibilities and finding out the whole truth would ruin the fun.

Either way, it’s just a treat to have this guy entertaining us on the set and at the table.