Here's Your Official Bernie Sanders Softball Scouting Report

Kyle Koster

Bernie Sanders played some softball at the Field of Dreams in Dyersville, Iowa, this afternoon because that’s an important state for presidential hopefuls. The senator, who turns 78 next month, showed glimpses of real talent out on the field but also has a few glaring red flags for any Major League Baseball franchise considering picking him up.

Here, based on the smallest sample size possible, is a scouting report. For those unfamiliar with the 20-80 scale, here’s a primer.

Hitting: 50

Power: 20

Speed: 55

Fielding: N/A

Throwing: 40

Pitching: 45

Overview: Sanders, who somehow both bats and throws righty, possess a presence in the batter’s box but can tend to get happy feet. His slap-and-run style, combined with above-average speed to first base considering his age, makes him a prototypical No. 2 hitter. He’ll put the ball in play but a complete lack of hip rotation and fading upper-body strength mean extra-base power is very lacking.

On the mound, he’ll attack the hitter and force them to put the ball in play. He’s comfortable challenging a slugger. Something about taking on those with power, scouts say.

In the clubhouse he treats everyone as equals but could be problematic for front offices down the line as he’s been known to advocate for flatter salaries. Very principled but could fall in love with a revolutionary approach to the game instead of sticking to the game plan.