Ezekiel Elliott used to have a remarkable six-pack. Alabama fans will remember it looking especially taut as the then-Buckeye broke off another long touchdown run as Ohio State sprinted to an unlikely national championship. But he's reverted back to the mean ever so slightly with a stomach only more ripped than, like, 94 percent of the viewing population.
The crop top enthusiast and Cowboys running back, perhaps inspired by The Sneetches, took some time during the offseason to get some new ink on the valuable real estate, which he revealed after scoring a touchdown Sunday night in the season opener against the Rams.
An interesting and literally choice. I particularly enjoy the font as it is that of a C-level superhero. Wait, I take that back. The exclamation mark appears to be a bone! That's the type of artistic flourish you need to really ruminate on to fully appreciate.
Elliott's unique choice could be a gamechanger. As an aging person I recognize the importance of placing instructions all over one's body so the brain can remember what that part is supposed to do. Like a reboot of Momento for the nervous system to enjoy in perpetuity.
The only danger, of course, is if Zeke packs on 35 more pounds and starts to look like a softball legend. Actually, no, then it will be ironic. Guy really thought of everything.