Brazilian Soccer Team Invents Novel New Tactic to Block Free Kicks, Gets Owned Anyway

By Mike Cardillo

Ponte Preta recently took on Parana in the second round of the Copa do Brasil. Of course you already knew this since everyone who frequents this site is an expert on worldwide club soccer. During the match, Ponte Preta implemented a brand new way to block a free kick attempt — lining up a player (Edno) like he was Lester Nygaard in the trunk of a car — behind the normal wall.

The theory here, I think, is to stop the kick taker from going low under the wall a la Cristiano Ronaldo last week vs. Bayern Munich, even it it meant the guy on the ground would expose both his face AND reproductive organs to a blast from a soccer ball. That’s either sheer stupidity or bravery oozing with pure machismo.

Sound theory or not, it didn’t work.

At all.

Parana’s Lucio Flavio simply dinked the ball effortlessly into the top corner, spoiling all that creative wriggling on the ground by Edno. The match ended 1-1.

Maybe next time.

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