Roundup: Topanga is in Maxim, Will Smith Sings the Fresh Prince Song at a High School & a Meth Lab in a Texas Tech Dorm
Blake Lively … hey crowds, check out this shark! … and you thought Manti Te’o got catfished? Read this … the oral history of fat Chicago Bulls dancers … teacher sends naked photos to students … what happened to Time, Inc? … Gilbert Gottfried actually sounds normal … Topanga posed for Maxim … meth lab in a Texas Tech dorm? … USC basketball players starting fights in Washington? … rhabdomyolysis scares hits Ohio State athletes … a terrifying mugshot …
It’s Big East Tournament week. You’ll read a lot of throwback stories – I suggest starting here. [NYT]
Quit saying the Knicks “won” the Carmelo deal, folks. [Denver Post]
“Federal authorities accuse two men of hiding sports betting money.” [Review Journal]
Norman Chad hates Nate Silver, Bracketologists & NFL Draftniks. [Couch Slouch]
How do you think Seth Greenberg is doing at ESPN so far? [Wash Post]
How MLS veteran Pablo Mastroeni returned to soccer after a concussion knocked him out of the sport for a year. [MLS Soccer]
The life of University of Alabama wheelchair basketball players. [AL.com]
“UNC-Chapel Hill faculty want debate about athletics role after two years of scandals.” [News & Observer]
If you play fantasy college football make sure to grab Paul Richardson, the Colorado receiver. [Post]
This Nolan Ryan drama sounds like new management doesn’t want him talking to the media. [Morning News]
Indiana student claims he was told he had to wear a Wolverines shirt in Ann Arbor. [Inside the Hall]
Mike Trout can do more than hit – he’s a marketing wizard. [OC Register]
Couple days old, but Bieber vs. the British paps is a few seconds of fun.
I’d call that a dangerous corner. [via Adam]
Will Smith, still cool. And yes, this is one of the greatest TV theme songs of all-time.
Mum is calling in the middle of this crucial TV report! [via Hot Clicks]

- Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
- Young Rockies Fans Also Sport Giant Purple Mohawks
- Legends Football League Issues Statement About Coach Yelling, “I’m gonna punch you in the face” at Female Player
- Former UFC Fighter Waylon Lowe Suing Philly Sex Shop After a Gel Left His Genitals Burned and Scarred
- Brian Urlacher: Combining Old School and New School in Chicago, and Probably a Spot in Canton

- Some Random Old Dude on Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
- Monster is Meth on Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
- Monster is Meth on Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
- A.P. on Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
- Monster is Meth on Chuck Norris Wants a NFL Team to Sign Tim Tebow Because He is a Winner Like Chuck Norris
113 Responses to “Roundup: Topanga is in Maxim, Will Smith Sings the Fresh Prince Song at a High School & a Meth Lab in a Texas Tech Dorm”
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March 11th, 2013 at 8:23 AM
This fucking 7-UP ad has got to go – there is nothing worse than full page takeover ads. A close second is the Barilla/skiing ad that is eating the left side of my browser.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:25 AM
I saw the Topanga stuff over the weekend. Good god is her face a whole bunch of “meh.” I never watched the show that made her famous, so I have no connection to her and have never understood why people find her attractive.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:26 AM
Two cool things about the Nuggets’ article: one, GM Masai Ujiri did a great job putting that Denver roster together. Two, the trade strengthened the Knicks.
The trade helped both teams & indirectly improved the league’s profile (NY having a good team helps that).
March 11th, 2013 at 8:27 AM
Don’t we need to see the photos first in order to judge if they were harmful? There were a few hot teachers in my high school that I would have paid to have such photos sent.
/Ms. Frazier…
//swoons
March 11th, 2013 at 8:27 AM
also up there for me are the “cable tv is so annoying …” ads currently on tv. i could not change the channel any faster when one of those comes on
/ ohh were we talking about online ads only
March 11th, 2013 at 8:28 AM
If you play fantasy college football make sure to grab Paul Richardson, the Colorado receiver. [Post] stop and evaluate the life choices you’re making.
WELL DONE
March 11th, 2013 at 8:29 AM
Texas Tech kids go hard, apparently. I knew a dude who grew Shermans in his dorm at UGA, but a full meth lab is pretty intense.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:29 AM
I’m with you on this Husker. I wouldn’t kick her out of bed for eating crackers, but she’s not doing anything for me
March 11th, 2013 at 8:31 AM
does someone want to notify Roeth about the greatest internet invention of the 21st century
March 11th, 2013 at 8:31 AM
Another Blake Lively roundup. Great.
And the 7up ad…. see everyone in a few days while that gets fixed.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:32 AM
only the first one was funny (the dentist sneexing into the guys mouth), the rest have been awful
March 11th, 2013 at 8:32 AM
*sneezing
March 11th, 2013 at 8:33 AM
Does someone want to notify JMac that while at work I don’t have many options to combat this other than what our IT group allows us to use?
March 11th, 2013 at 8:34 AM
Always amazed when people don’t realize or understand that most of us can’t just download AdBlock at work. There are protocols for these things.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:35 AM
how do you hide the smell of a meth lab in a dorm? not that i know what a meth lab smells like, but i can assume it’s pungent.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:39 AM
You’re referring to free porn, correct?
March 11th, 2013 at 8:40 AM
I can think of two reasons.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:42 AM
ah, my bad Roeth. apologies.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:43 AM
You have to burn it down, right?
March 11th, 2013 at 8:44 AM
Re: Topanga
you should have seen her a couple yrs ago. she looked like a meth addict. the air-brushed maxim pics are a welcomed sight after seeing how far she’d fallen from how good she looked in her younger days
March 11th, 2013 at 8:45 AM
Nothing is worse than those SPCA commercials. I switch the channel so fast when they come on. As a dog lover it makes me wonder if their commercials are counter productive. I don’t see how any animal lover can sit through those.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:45 AM
She’s had many distinct body changes post-Boy Meets World.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:48 AM
I’ve always here the smell is like really bad cat piss.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:49 AM
Golfers: How did Tiger look this weekend? I know he won, but based on the scores I can assume the course wasn’t exactly putting up a fight.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:50 AM
Golfers: How did Tiger look this weekend? I know he won, but based on the scores I can assume the course wasn’t exactly putting up a fight.
dominant. absolutely dominant. it was awesome to watch.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:50 AM
He was sinking the majority of his putts and his iron game was ridiculous as always. He might destroy the field at the US Open this year.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:50 AM
Kids with cancer TV spots are worse than the sad dogs. Both are uncomfortable and require quick change of channel.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:52 AM
Holy hell.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:52 AM
You’re referring to free porn, correct?
/waits for johndewar to wash his hands
//HIGH FIVES
March 11th, 2013 at 8:52 AM
Always amazed when people don’t realize or understand that most of us can’t just download AdBlock at work.
Exactly.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:52 AM
Had this guy for an intro Physics class at Chapel Hill. Idiot.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:52 AM
I am hoping that one of these days Bieber mouths off to the wrong paparazzi and then get’s quickly dealt with.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:53 AM
I didn’t think internet was allowed when selecting a new Pope?
March 11th, 2013 at 8:53 AM
I can assume the course wasn’t exactly putting up a fight.
i wouldn’t say it was easy by any stretch. it was windy and the greens were fast as fuck. tiger was nailing putts and that was the major difference.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:55 AM
We had some nice weather here so I didn’t watch the golf wall-to-wall but Tiger was on cruise control SAT-SUN. Just picking up birdies on the easy holes, hitting a few awesome shots, and then watched other elite guys miss very makeable birdie putts, go at sucker pins resulting in bogeys, and play out of their comfort zones.
It was like a time capsule from PGA Tour 2000-2008.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:57 AM
Does someone want to notify JMac that while at work I don’t have many options to combat this other than what our IT group allows us to use?
Exactly – and it’s every time the page refreshes. Crazy. WHO BUYS SODA BECAUSE OF A FULL PAGE INTERNET AD? Waste of money/time that just pisses off customers.
March 11th, 2013 at 8:58 AM
guess ya missed the whole big titties part
March 11th, 2013 at 8:59 AM
I think it moved.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:00 AM
It moves for Tiger, but not Topanga. Got it.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:01 AM
dominant. absolutely dominant. it was awesome to watch.
He was sinking the majority of his putts and his iron game was ridiculous as always. He might destroy the field at the US Open this year.
I think it moved.
green jacket
March 11th, 2013 at 9:01 AM
Those are a dime-a-dozen on the internet. And they’re not nearly good enough to make up for her horse face.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:01 AM
Tiger’s really working on the metal aspect of his game, leading up to the tournament he banged an entire women’s community college rugby team, 3 Golden Griddle waitresses and an midget porn star. He’s back!
March 11th, 2013 at 9:03 AM
He might destroy the field at the US Open this year.
yeah he had big wins before Auguta and the US Open last year too.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:04 AM
midget porn star
they prefer little people bro
March 11th, 2013 at 9:07 AM
Good for him. He’s not married, so he should be dipping his dick into whatever vagina will have him.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:07 AM
This was my thought just now, actually. Until I see him win another major I will be skeptical.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:08 AM
True, but his confidence looks restored, at least from what I saw this weekend and the few other events I’ve watched this year. And Merion plays to his strengths with the iron game.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:10 AM
That catfish story…wow..the guy is looney
March 11th, 2013 at 9:10 AM
I used to find 7-UP quite enjoyable.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:11 AM
Hello annoying 7UP ad.
Tiger looked great. Led after each round, putting tip from “Stricks” must have really helped. He did hit a tee shot into a tree on Saturday.
FIGJAM was so desperately wanting to get into the final pairing on the weekend. He was doing his typical make great shots and then miss the short putt.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:12 AM
I would not be surprised at all whatever he wins. I mean he shredded people at Bay Hill last year. He won by 5 and it would of been 7-8 if that person didnt scream in his shot on that one hole. He was disgusting filthy at Memorial too.
I think we just need to view it through the proper prism. He’s certainly capable. But he he needs to do it the way he did this week and the way he’s done it in the past. Get out to a nice lead and be a good frontrunner.
I’m really looking to see what some of these younger guys can do at Augusta. Bradley, Johnson, Rory on those par 5′s.
/Tiger did hit that 5-wood 290 yesterday on that one par 5.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:14 AM
Understand that, but people on Google search for “Midget Porn” 162,000 thousand more times a month than “little people porn” so it’s how she has to brand herself. Commerce brah, it’s a bitch.
/65,000 more times than “dwarf porn”
March 11th, 2013 at 9:14 AM
question for the hockey guys:
Crosby had 5 assists in a 6-1 win. he is listed as a +3 for the game. how is this not at least a +4 (assuming he was on the ice for the Isles goal)?
March 11th, 2013 at 9:14 AM
I read that on Friday. Dude is a classic narcissist it seems.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:16 AM
Great taste.
10 calories.
Have both!
7 UP!
/stubbornly uncorrupted and unbeholden
March 11th, 2013 at 9:17 AM
When we’ve resorted to breaking on of these out for those guys perhaps it’s time to put to bed the oral history thing and attempt some real writing
March 11th, 2013 at 9:18 AM
Re Tiger. The Florida courses generally don’t have any defenses for him. They’re long, which plays to one of his strengths, and the only really penalty is water. You can bomb it 320 and 30+ yards off line. Unless you hit water, there’s still a open look at the green.
That said, his putter was as good as it’s been in some time.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:18 AM
Understand that, but people on Google search for “Midget Porn” 162,000 thousand more times a month than “little people porn” so it’s how she has to brand herself. Commerce brah, it’s a bitch.
/65,000 more times than “dwarf porn”
damn dude. i was just joking. but kudos on the research aspect.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:18 AM
Who is this tiger guy? Some token black golfer? Never heard of him.i
March 11th, 2013 at 9:19 AM
power play goals dont impact plus-minus
March 11th, 2013 at 9:21 AM
power play goals dont impact plus-minus
did not know that. gracias
March 11th, 2013 at 9:21 AM
Cant be a 7UP ad without the “7UP guy”
March 11th, 2013 at 9:23 AM
PPGs don’t count in the +/- stats
March 11th, 2013 at 9:25 AM
7-Up needs to ditch that ad and bring back dnL. that stuff was incredible.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:26 AM
Disappointed it wasn’t the “Make 7, Up Yours” guy. Loved him in Evolution.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:26 AM
I wonder if her fellow dwarf buddies in the arts think she’s selling out, she’s a cornball dwarf or something and setting the community back. I’ll ask Tiger on twitter.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:29 AM
IIRC, a short-handed PPG goal will help a +/- and negatively impact a team on the man-advantage. When I ran the off-ice stats this always causes headaches when we did the final tallies.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:29 AM
Reading the catfish story now, this made me laugh:
March 11th, 2013 at 9:29 AM
The Catholic 7?
March 11th, 2013 at 9:33 AM
What I couldn’t get over was how he opened the suitcase, saw that it was empty, yet couldn’t pick it up and realize that there was an extra 2 kilos (5 pounds, right?) of weight. He couldn’t feel around and realize that something was off about the suitcase? Pretty sure homeboy knew what he was doing and was just looking for some poon. We can add him to the long list of men who have done incredibly stupid things in search of vagina.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:35 AM
Tiger’s really working on the metal aspect of his game,
He is really becoming a huge Mastodon fan. It is paying off.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:36 AM
Fuck that 7-up ad right in the goat ass.
These wheelchair athletes absolutely fascinate me. Is there such a thing as wheelchair golf?
March 11th, 2013 at 9:37 AM
And, I mean, it’s Denise Milani. (SFW)
March 11th, 2013 at 9:38 AM
Holy tits, chief
March 11th, 2013 at 9:38 AM
Is that the chick he thought he was speaking with? Hilarious.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:39 AM
Wheelchair golf? Spencer is going to paralyze himself
March 11th, 2013 at 9:39 AM
Denise Milani always wins.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:39 AM
And, I mean, it’s Denise Milani. (SFW)
A link says it is from a wordpress acct that includes the info
pigtails
monster tits
tiny bikini
As much as I’d like to click I’m going to save myself a chat with the HR office.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:40 AM
Wheelchair would be interesting. You think they would have to be playing with oversized clubs.. It would probably get my interest.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:41 AM
Frampton reported that he was a month into his prison stay before his fellow prisoners managed to convince him that the woman he thought he’d been in touch with all this time had probably been a man impersonating her.
I work with PhDs. Absolutely brilliant at what they do. Yet, some of the most egotistical people in the world that can’t tie their shoes. I totally believe this guy was delusional enough that he thought he was going to put his seed in Milani.
Also, Milani >>>>>>>>>>>>> Tobanga or whatever her name is.
I’m off to get a Sprite.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:42 AM
Yes, she definitely has a lot of fans around the world – when I realized he thought he was talking to her in the first paragraph, there was absolutely no feeling sorry for him.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:42 AM
crisp and clean with no caffeine. never had it, never will
March 11th, 2013 at 9:42 AM
Those are some fine godzilla biscuits.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:49 AM
Ewww, they are both nasty with sloppy floppy tits.
/Tim Ryan’d
//has these worn out its welcome yet?
March 11th, 2013 at 9:51 AM
For those born in the 80s Topanga was everything. Similar to what most (70s?) kids would feel about Winnie Cooper.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:54 AM
I’ve never seen more than one episode of that show. Never had an urge to.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:55 AM
For those born in the 80s Topanga was everything
i grew up in the 80s and topanga was an ugly skank then, too. plus, that show was trash. she was nothing to me.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:57 AM
Topanga and Winnie Cooper. Why yes, please.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:57 AM
Anybody here played Doral? I’d really like to see what #18 is all about. One of the harder holes I can remember really paying attention to. Dudes were hitting it in the water like crazy this weekend.
March 11th, 2013 at 9:59 AM
Where does Tiffani Amber Thiessen fall into this Topanga/Winnie thing?
March 11th, 2013 at 10:01 AM
I haven’t. Normally it plays into the wind, 475 with the water there on the left and missing right you get a recovery shot chipping over the bunker with the green running away away from you.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:02 AM
Brutal stuff.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:02 AM
Kelly Kapowski is way up here.
/holds hand way above head
Those other bitches are way down here.
/holds hand around knees
March 11th, 2013 at 10:02 AM
Anybody here played Doral? I’d really like to see what #18 is all about. One of the harder holes I can remember really paying attention to. Dudes were hitting it in the water like crazy this weekend.
never played there, but the drink was in play because of the crazy winds. but trump just purchased the resort and is going to make some renovations to the course.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:03 AM
I thought I heard yesterday that 18 is going to change a bit with the redesign. Anyone hear how?
March 11th, 2013 at 10:04 AM
I thought I heard yesterday that 18 is going to change a bit with the redesign. Anyone hear how?
they said that about a few holes. i assume they’ll just move some tee boxes.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:04 AM
Did Thiessen date a Savage brother on her show?
March 11th, 2013 at 10:05 AM
In first place by a mile.
So this 68 year old guy really thought this Milani bikini model was going to settle down with him and have his kids??? Really. The amazing power of the vagina, its like the Death Star tractor beam.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:06 AM
18 is being left alone. I think every other hole is being re-done. That course does little for me, I just like that the weather is nice and it makes good TV. Hanse is the designer du jour so we’ll see what he can do. I think bulldozers are on site today.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:06 AM
Figured somebody would bring her up. Thiessen is up there for me, but SBTB was never a must watch.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:07 AM
What’s the hardest hole you’ve played?
Mine still may be #14 at the Rawls Course in LBK – Texas Tech’s home course. 500 yard par-4 dead into a constant south wind. I’ve been driver, 3-wood, half wedge into that thing several times.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:10 AM
They’ve changed plans a few times at Doral – here’s a recap of the changes:
http://www.geoffshackelford.com/homepage/2013/3/6/the-trump-blue-monster-renovation-plan-revealed.html
March 11th, 2013 at 10:13 AM
The last paragraph was easily the best: “One of Frampton’s last e-mails to Denise Milani was written on a pirated cellphone a month into his stay inside Devoto prison: “I only think of cuddling all day and having sex all night with Denise Milani. How can you prove that you are Denise Milani?””
March 11th, 2013 at 10:15 AM
Trump has to get rid of those dinosaur sized lizards running around Doral. Those things are fucking terrifying.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:15 AM
My course resume is pretty thin. I’ve been fortuanate to play some old school country clubs, I really like the test of some of the old-fashioned piano-top greens that just murder you for hitting over the hole.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:17 AM
The Broadmoor in Colorado will forever be the toughest greens for me. The greens are all elevated and it makes putting difficult because everything breaks away from the giant mountain, but when you read the putt, because of the elevated greens, it creates optical illusions. A four putt is definitely a thing there.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:17 AM
I think we can agree that illegal sport streaming websites are the greatest invention.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:23 AM
The link to an interview with Milani in the story she says,
. Okay.
They call the scam a “honeytrap” sounds better than catfish.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:25 AM
ESPN America. Fuck yeah.
March 11th, 2013 at 10:31 AM
Another Blake Lively roundup
agreed. only one of us is being sarcastic
March 11th, 2013 at 10:51 AM
To be a broken record, these banner ads have to go. This is insane. Impossible to read the blog.
March 11th, 2013 at 1:38 PM
I love everything about Blake Lively including every blessed inch of her gorgeous legs … but she always looks like she’s wearing shoes a size too big.
March 11th, 2013 at 3:04 PM
way late to the party, but he also hit a 193 yard 8i PIN FUCKING HIGH.