Darren Rovell Wants You to Know that Oscar Pistorius Was Wearing Oakley When Arrested, Because Of Course
Darren Rovell is the worst. Oops, I forgot to change my name on that to become anonymous.
With the news trickling out late last night that Oscar Pistorius had shot and killed his girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp, and then this morning that he had been arrested and charged with murder, you knew that it would be Rovell who would give us the proper level of perspective.
Pistorius was wearing a sweatshirt made by Oakley, his sponsor, when he was taken by police twitpic.com/c3p324
— darren rovell (@darrenrovell) February 14, 2013
Boom. Product placement. If I am ever charged with a heinous crime, it will be a banner day for the makers of Zubaz.
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65 Responses to “Darren Rovell Wants You to Know that Oscar Pistorius Was Wearing Oakley When Arrested, Because Of Course”
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February 14th, 2013 at 11:32 AM
If I am ever charged with a heinous crime, it will be a banner day for the makers of Zubaz.
Awesome.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:33 AM
Oakley is also the world leader in polarized lenses.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:34 AM
does rovell think he did this because he was contractually obligated? because the more likely explanation is that the dude has a metric fuckton of free oakley gear lying around.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:34 AM
@darrenovell: The poor victim was bathed in crimson, not unlike the Alabama National Championship Commemorative T-Shirts available from the Nike Store. #reallymakesyoustopandthinkaboutwhoyourereallysupportingamiright?
February 14th, 2013 at 11:34 AM
That has to be the most Rovell tweet ever.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:35 AM
I love my pair of Oakley glasses. The lenses are beat the fuck up though.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:35 AM
I’ll probably be wearing a $75 deep v-neck.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:36 AM
It is a nice hoodie.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:36 AM
Smiths > Oakley all day every day.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:39 AM
when we were going back and forth recently, i was looking for this description. damn you, hernia!
February 14th, 2013 at 11:39 AM
Laundry Day, eh?
February 14th, 2013 at 11:39 AM
Too bad Twitter wasn’t around in ’94 to let Rovell tell us how much free advertising Bruno Magli was getting
February 14th, 2013 at 11:41 AM
I expected more from Rovell, like Oscar was mad because he couldn’t land a shoe deal
February 14th, 2013 at 11:42 AM
TMZ is reporting that noted Snooki stalker, Tim Ryan, arrived at the courthouse with his legal team, but chose not to comment.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:42 AM
maybe he was trying to make a point of how this could negatively affect the Oakley brand?
February 14th, 2013 at 11:43 AM
TMZ is reporting that noted Snooki stalker, Tim Ryan, arrived at the courthouse with his legal team, but chose not to comment.
That is some finely plucked chest hair.
Or are you a debilitating cream sort of guy, Tim?
February 14th, 2013 at 11:43 AM
Costa del Mar > Oakley
February 14th, 2013 at 11:44 AM
Or are you a debilitating cream sort of guy, Tim?
You rub it on your body, and it makes you much weaker
February 14th, 2013 at 11:45 AM
I had never heard of Smiths before. Checked out their site and like the look of some of them. I’ve been rocking these for a couple of years now.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:46 AM
All joking aside, Rovell has totally lost perspective. If twitter was around during 9/11, I guarantee he would be giving a shout out to the company that provided the steel beam as the towers were collapsing.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:47 AM
I was rocking a white t-shirt and basketball shorts when I got cuffed and stuffed. Good thing it was warm outside when I was released.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:47 AM
So true. While I’m not sure I buy Oscar’s story, if it is true this is just a terrible, terrible tragedy.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:48 AM
Awesome. Don’t forget the slacks
You would. No.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:48 AM
Why’d you give Coop your login?
February 14th, 2013 at 11:49 AM
I think he truly needs help. His job consumes every one of his thoughts.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:49 AM
Toyota got all kinds of free advertisement when they discovered Rae Carruth hiding in the trunk of a Camry.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:51 AM
I gave Coop whatever he asked for.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:52 AM
The shoe thrown at George W was Cole Haan. Good publicity, for some
February 14th, 2013 at 11:54 AM
So Darren Rovell can identify major corporate logos and passed basic algebra. He gets paid 6 figures to demonstrate this on a daily basis.
/slices wrists
February 14th, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Leitch’s article on Rovell was spot on, the guy is just the biggest douche going.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:55 AM
Is this like MacDonalds getting huge pub when Old Dirty Bastard was found hiding in one of thier dumpsters?
Husker – Smiths rule. Barely scratch, had my pair for over 2 years
February 14th, 2013 at 11:56 AM
I hope I have my Yoo-Hoo shirt on when they haul me away.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:57 AM
Toyota trucks are official sponsor of Al-Qaeda and Taliban. Militants used to love them some Toyota Trucks. During Taliban regime, they put machine guns in truck bed and went around patrolling neighborhoods.
February 14th, 2013 at 11:58 AM
Size: XXXL
February 14th, 2013 at 11:58 AM
My childhood friend had a DARE shirt on when robbing a liquor store while drunk
February 14th, 2013 at 12:00 PM
More than likely I’ll be commando when I get hauled off to the stoney lonesome. Why? Because underwear is THE WORST.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:03 PM
No Mullet, wear underwear and a white t. The jail will most likely let you keep them. Beats wearing state undies and not having another layer of clothing.
/
wore two pairs of underwear and a white t to every meeting with parole officer
February 14th, 2013 at 12:03 PM
Ya’ll are just mean girls
February 14th, 2013 at 12:04 PM
That’s a great pro-tip. Always commit crimes/see parole officer with two pairs of clean underwear on.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:05 PM
And have 200 in cash on you
February 14th, 2013 at 12:05 PM
Ray Ban > Oakley
February 14th, 2013 at 12:08 PM
We know that O.J. was rockin’ that Ford Bronco the first time he was arrested, yet who knows what he was driving the second time he was arrested?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:08 PM
Reminds me of Marvin Barnes, all-time Providence great. 6’9″ tall and robbed a liquor store while wearing his high school jacket with “Marvin” emblazoned on the front. Shocked he got caught.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:10 PM
Thinking about some. Polarized worth the extra?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:13 PM
Tough to say. Even with polarized they are a nice upgrade over other cheap stuff. But yeah the polarized really really makes them nice.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:13 PM
Any truth to the rumor that Hitler was wearing Birkenstocks when he signed off on the Wannsee Conference report?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:14 PM
I would say yes. Polarized are awesome.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:15 PM
I thought he was wearing Doc Martens?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:15 PM
PeerLess, I have a pair of polarized RayBan’s and I love em. I don’t like wearing them golfing, but other than that they are great shades. the frames have scratched a little bit but not the lenses. great for fishing, if you are into that.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:16 PM
Guy I played high school football with walked into the convenience store he shopped at regularly, walked to the back of the store, pulled a ski mask on and tried to hold the store up. Cashier, who knew him, just looked at him and said, “Dude, I know it’s you, I just saw you come in.” So he left, and the cops were at his house right quick.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:17 PM
Thanks guys. Was leaning that way. Have some Radar’s but polarized is so much more for them.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:20 PM
if you are spending on sunglasses and dont get polarized lenses, you are an idiot
February 14th, 2013 at 12:22 PM
“Dude, I know it’s you, I just saw you come in.”
Why would you say that? What if the guy does something foolish?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:22 PM
Like the dude in White Men Cant Jump?
February 14th, 2013 at 12:23 PM
Love that the Bleacher Report dudes have mounted their high horses in Rovell’s defense. Pretty, pretty perfect.
Exactly what I was thinking.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:29 PM
I went into a convenience store late one night to get some diapers. We were down on our luck, so I decided to rob the store. I went to the womens section, tore open a pack of panty hose, and stuck one on my head. My wife saw me, got pissed, and took off in the car. I went to the counter and demanded the money, and the cashier pulled a shotgun. I run up and down the ailes, avoiding every shotgun blast. The cops showed up, and I took off, running through the neigborhood. There were dozens of dogs chasing me, running through yards and even through a few houses. I ended up carjacking an old man, and to my dismay, informed me that I had a panty on my head. Anyway, long story short, my wife ended up picking me up down the street, and I made my escape with the diapers in hand.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:30 PM
I’ve understood that dude’s purpose in life… he invented a field and suddenly everyone gave him credibility. I’ve never followed him, but all I’ve seen retweeted or otherwise is idiotic stuff that is ‘sports’ but forced into a ‘sports business’ label, so he has a job (isn’t all sports business?)
I don’t blame him, I blame all those assholes who follow him and make him think he’s a worthy human being.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:30 PM
Comment of the year
February 14th, 2013 at 12:31 PM
Costa Del Mar has the most advanced lenses ever made. Of this, there is no debate.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:39 PM
I went into a convenience store late one night to get some diapers. We were down on our luck, so I decided to rob the store. I went to the womens section, tore open a pack of panty hose, and stuck one on my head. My wife saw me, got pissed, and took off in the car. I went to the counter and demanded the money, and the cashier pulled a shotgun. I run up and down the ailes, avoiding every shotgun blast. The cops showed up, and I took off, running through the neigborhood. There were dozens of dogs chasing me, running through yards and even through a few houses. I ended up carjacking an old man, and to my dismay, informed me that I had a panty on my head. Anyway, long story short, my wife ended up picking me up down the street, and I made my escape with the diapers in hand.
Only issue I have is this could have been broken up into a # of comments.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:40 PM
sounds like the plot for raising arizona.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:46 PM
…and a fresh pair of pantyhose. You know…a little something for the missus.
February 14th, 2013 at 12:57 PM
FeloniousMullet
February 14th, 2013 at 1:02 PM
I don’t understand the point of Darren Rovell. He doesn’t know enough about sports for me to give a shit what he thinks/says, and he doesn’t know nearly enough about business for me to give a shit what he thinks/says.
February 14th, 2013 at 5:18 PM
Contrary to JMac’s interview with him last week, DR is a jackass