Police were doing a “probation compliance” check this afternoon at home in California when they discovered 34 pounds of marijuana and a guard alligator. From the San Francisco Chronicle:

The reptile, named “Mr. Teeth,” acted as a deterrent against marijuana thieves, said sheriff’s Sgt. J.D. Nelson.

Mr. Teeth’s owner, Assif Mayr, 32, got the alligator in 1996 “to commemorate the death of rapper Tupac Shakur,” Nelson said.

And that sums up the thought process of a 16-year old boy. His favorite rapper was shot to death, so he bought an alligator to honor his memory. And he named it Mr. Teeth… because its an alligator, duh. Then he spends the next 16 years growing a buttload of pot for the gator to guard.

In more somber news, Mr. Teeth was ill and taken to the Oakland Zoo. Our thoughts are with Mr. Teeth. Here’s to a speedy recovery.

Update: Mr. Teeth died this morning at the Oakland Zoo.

[@ellenhuet via @Mengus22]