Chipper Jones Built His Kids a Basketball Hoop With a Ladder On It For Christmas

All, Baseball Stephen Douglas December 27th. 2012, 3:30pm

Chipper Jones is recently retired and the father of four sons. Like any father around Christmas, Chipper was faced with the task of putting together his sons’ new basketball hoop. Chipper did so in the garage with great success. So long as you ignore the common household step ladder that is affixed to the hoop. Son of a…

[@RealCJ10]

Previously: Chipper Jones Dating Playboy Coed Model Taylor Higgins, Enjoying Retirement

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47 Responses to “Chipper Jones Built His Kids a Basketball Hoop With a Ladder On It For Christmas”

1
Al Czervik Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:32 PM
Isn’t the base pointing in the wrong direction as well?
2
Mantis Toboggan Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:33 PM
For sure an OSHA violation
3
Wally's World Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:34 PM
Holy Shit. That might be the first non-commenter related I’ve laughed at on here in a long time. That is f’n hilarious.
I may or may not be susceptible to problems like this as well…
4
VladimirCrouton Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:36 PM
Keep drinking and dippin Chipper.
5
TheRealAC Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:38 PM
he obviously did this sans dip. and this is what you get when you take on projects like this sans dip.
6
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:41 PM
now that’s funny. Next step, sawzall. After that, emergency room.
7
YYSA Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:42 PM
/cracks beer
//gets in brand new massage chair
fuck it.
8
illformula Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:42 PM
bolt cutters, meet ladder.
no chance i’d take it apart and rebuild.
and what AC said.
9
arkbadger Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:43 PM
Keep drinking and dippin Chipper.
fuckin A right.
10
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:43 PM
//gets in brand new massage chair
like a real chair, or an insert, or a cheapass chair? You can just tell me about how much it cost, and I’ll know the answer.
11
TheRealAC Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:45 PM
bolt cutters, meet ladder.
no chance i’d take it apart and rebuild.
still gotta get the backboard facing the correct direction. also thats a pretty shitty looking hoop. the backboard should be a little farther from the pole there or you’re going to run right into it.
12
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:45 PM
bolt cutters, meet ladder.
no chance i’d take it apart and rebuild.
would you then repair the cut stepladder with a piece of dowel rod and duct tape, or just pitch it? Because if you did 2 cuts, right on the top, you might could save it.
13
YYSA Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:46 PM
like a real chair, or an insert, or a cheapass chair? You can just tell me about how much it cost, and I’ll know the answer.
behind the hoop you can see a new massage chair. Thats the legit 3,000 dollar we better not ever have to foreclose this house and move this bitch kind.
14
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:47 PM
still gotta get the backboard facing the correct direction.
I think that part is right. I think it looks like this one
15
TheRealAC Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:49 PM
I think that part is right. I think it looks like this one
wild. never seen one like that before.
16
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:49 PM
behind the hoop you can see a new massage chair. Thats the legit 3,000 dollar we better not ever have to foreclose this house and move this bitch kind.
oh, that is a nice one. Yeah, 3 Gs. They’re so hideous and heavy, besides expensive.
17
Clayton Cargill Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:52 PM
wild. never seen one like that before.
it’s got a rebounder on it. For those days when you aren’t allowed back inside until the sun goes down, and the sun doesn’t go down until 10pm in the Texas desert.
18
illformula Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:52 PM
would you then repair the cut stepladder with a piece of dowel rod and duct tape, or just pitch it?
that depends how drunk i was at that point.
19
Wally's World Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:53 PM
So, Chipper has made what? About $100 mil?
Go to the nearest swingset company, contract those dudes to put up the best damn Goalrilla hoop with fiberglass backboard, including cushioned pole. The best of the best likely costs about 2 G’s. Spend the money, Larry. You. Cheap. Bastard.
20
YYSA Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:53 PM
They’re so hideous and heavy, besides expensive.
They really are one of those items that is fantastic to imagine yourself in at home when at Brookstone but really would just be a pain to deal with and overall a good lazy boy would be the much better choice. I mean I like to sit and have my shit shook but for 3k I could probably just go see somebody about that.
21
s1rweeze Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:53 PM
Come on, no “J-Mac already tried this in hopes of dunking someday” jokes?
22
illformula Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:54 PM
it’s got a rebounder on it.
for the kids with no friends.
23
Smallie Bigs Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:55 PM
this reminds me of the time I was putting together the bar stools we have. I was a few bong rips deep, put the first one together and put an important part on backwards. Took it apart, flipped the part around, finished the stool.
Started the second one, finished the second one, then realized I put the same important part on backwards on the second stool.
24
YYSA Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:56 PM
Go to the nearest swingset company, contract those dudes to put up the best damn Goalrilla hoop with fiberglass backboard, including cushioned pole. The best of the best likely costs about 2 G’s. Spend the money, Larry. You. Cheap. Bastard.
Unless your kid is out there shooting hoops like MJ everyday I wouldn’t bother with that whole process either. Kids lose interest rather quickly. I’m sure many a father with a 20 foot circumference of dead grass in their yard can attest.
25
squawkbox Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:57 PM
He’s trying to make it into a duck blind. C’mon guys, don’t you know anything? Good gawd.
/spits
26
illformula Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:58 PM
Spend the money, Larry. You. Cheap. Bastard.
that was my first reaction, then i realized that he’s trying his hardest not to be Antoine Walker (or any other inexcusably broke athlete).
27
s1rweeze Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:59 PM
I’d totally watch a “Inebriated People Try To Put Together Ikea Furniture” show
28
Razor Shines Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 3:59 PM
I’d strongly consider getting the thing delivered assembled. If I had his money – I wouldn’t spend 10 seconds thinking about it or assembling it.
29
KC Resident Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:00 PM
he obviously did this sans dip. and this is what you get when you take on projects like this sans dip.
So, he shouldn’t consult with Josh Hamilton on this?
My mother gave my kid a nice one like this for Christmas a couple years ago. My brother and I spent two hours building it. It wasn’t particularly difficult, but there are a shit ton of pieces that go to an adjustable backboard. I’d suggest not attempting to build one of these after a Christmas Eve party.
30
squawkbox Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:02 PM
I’d suggest not attempting to build one of these after a Christmas Eve party.
Is that you, Andruw? Good call.
31
johndewar Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:02 PM
I’d totally watch a “Inebriated People Try To Put Together Ikea Furniture” show
McNulty (and later, Greggs) getting wasted and attempting to put Ikea furniture together always made me chuckle.
32
starkweather Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:03 PM
So, Chipper has made what? About $100 mil?
Per baseball-reference: Career to date (may be incomplete): $168,552,133
33
Wally's World Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:03 PM
that was my first reaction, then i realized that he’s trying his hardest not to be Antoine Walker (or any other inexcusably broke athlete).
Pretty sure spending the money on a Goalrilla for your 4 kids is SLIGHTLY different than spending all of your cash on splashing $50,000 worth of champagne in ‘da club, then driving to one of your 6 mansions in one of your 25 Bentley’s.
34
starkweather Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:04 PM
Larry’s got ex-wives to pay and an expensive new girlfriend. Plus, he’s got some time on his hands. He’s got his reasons for saving money and doing his own assemblage.
35
Mantis Toboggan Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:04 PM
I’d totally watch a “Inebriated People Try To Put Together Ikea Furniture” show
I swear to god Jimmy Mcnulty did this once. Can’t find a clip.
36
angry Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:04 PM
Damn I wish my garage was twice as big as it is.
37
starkweather Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:05 PM
I swear to god Jimmy Mcnulty did this once. Can’t find a clip.
Yes! It was a whole bedroom
38
KC Resident Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:06 PM
Also, I’m trying to figure out why a ladder was even needed. Those backboards are heavy as hell.
I’d strongly consider getting the thing delivered assembled. If I had his money – I wouldn’t spend 10 seconds thinking about it or assembling it.
He strikes me as a DIY type guy. He has nothing to do now. Cut the $40 ladder and no big deal.
39
sctrojans Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:06 PM
Should’ve just hired someone to install a gorilla hoop. He’s got the cash
40
squawkbox Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:07 PM
Had an “acquaintance” of mine that sold those fiberglass court surfaces. He had a god-awful bright blue one in his back yard.
It would’ve been OK with everyone in the neighborhood except for the fact that he’s such a tremendous jackass.
41
illformula Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:08 PM

Pretty sure spending the money on a Goalrilla for your 4 kids is SLIGHTLY different than spending all of your cash on splashing $50,000 worth of champagne in ‘da club, then driving to one of your 6 mansions in one of your 25 Bentley’s.
typical internet… athletes can do no right.
42
TheGilly Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:12 PM
I put one of those together a few years back. Then filled it with 400 lbs of sand. IT WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS!
43
sctrojans Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:13 PM
fiberglass court surfaces
I have a friend with one of those courts. They are ok, but unplayable with any precipitation
44
angry Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:14 PM
not sure how I stumbled upon this but whatever.
45
KC Resident Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:15 PM
Then filled it with 400 lbs of sand. IT WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS!
I filled mine with water. I did fill one of those outdoor umbrella bases with sand this spring. Pain in the ass, indeed.
46
s1rweeze Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:15 PM
McNulty (and later, Greggs) getting wasted and attempting to put Ikea furniture together always made me chuckle.
I forgot all about that. Allll the way back in season 1
47
sctrojans Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 4:20 PM
McNutty
/Bubs’d