The Miami Dolphins Are Who We Thought They Were
After the Dolphins blasted the Jets, 30-9, to win their 3rd straight game and improve to 4-3, there was actually playoff talk about Joe Philbin’s team. The schedule was favorable! The defense was exceeding expectations! So was rookie QB Ryan Tannehill! Reggie Bush was looking like a star running back!
Smoke and mirrors, apparently. Three games later, and the Dolphins have been exposed as frauds.
Since jumping to a 17-13 halftime lead over Indy the week after beating the Jets, the Dolphins have been outscored by a combined 63-20 by the Colts, Titans and Bills. Last night’s listless 19-14 defeat in Buffalo essentially ends Miami’s season. At 4-6, the schedule gets considerably more difficult – vs. Seattle, vs. New England, at San Francisco – and thus the Dolphins have basically locked up a 4th straight season at .500 or below.
The gory details from the loss to the Bills, who came in with a bottom-10 defense in points, yards and rushing yards allowed: Miami could only muster 184 yards of total offense, turned the ball over three times, and averaged a paltry 2.5 yards per carry. A source at CBS tells me Dan Marino was seen vomiting into a trash can last night watching this dumpster fire.
Fun stat that isn’t relevant, but at least six of you will find funny: Since it was revealed that Reggie Bush knocked up his dancer girlfriend (Oct. 7), he hasn’t had more than 60 yards rushing in a game, and has lost more fumbles (2) than scored touchdowns (1).

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48 Responses to “The Miami Dolphins Are Who We Thought They Were”
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November 16th, 2012 at 11:06 AM
Raise you’re hand if you’re one of the clowns who fell for the idea of the Dolphins as playoff contenders.
Never change.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:07 AM
Three games later, and the Dolphins have been exposed as frauds.
Refer to post 1.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:09 AM
I’m glad i went Colts > Dolphins as a playoff team a month ago.
Luck > Miami
November 16th, 2012 at 11:10 AM
Three games later, and the Dolphins have been exposed as frauds.
KC beat me to it. I mentioned this other day, but tbl lingo has infiltrated my everyday vocabulary. And I aint mad at it
November 16th, 2012 at 11:14 AM
I have Dolphins under 7.5 in Vegas. Last night was probably the clincher.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:15 AM
KC beat me to it. I mentioned this other day, but tbl lingo has infiltrated my everyday vocabulary. And I aint mad at it
I told my kid he was a clown the other day. He thought it was funny. I was like, “where did that come from.” It came from here.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:15 AM
As a Dolphin fan I wish I had a witty comeback to the “frauds” accusation. I don’t.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:18 AM
It may not be witty, but anyone who thought the Dolphins were a playoff team was fooling themselves.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:20 AM
KC, ‘clowns’, ‘frauds’, and sarcastic sentences that end in exclamation points it the J-Mac post trifecta. Really annoying writing style, though.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:22 AM
Never thought they were a playoff contender but would have liked them to improve as the year went, specifically Tannehill. Seems as though we peaked 3 weeks ago when we knocked the NYJ’s dicks in the dirt.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:23 AM
Next time, tell him he’s Todd Charske, then explain that one.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:23 AM
well done.
My only over/under was Tampa over 6 and Browns under 5 (same deal).
I like my chances with Tampa, have a slight worry about Cleveland.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:24 AM
Next time, tell him he’s Todd Charske, then explain that one. Nada
Ha. That was something else. I got dick to do today. I may revist the Todd Charske episode.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:24 AM
which is why i have avoided NFL posts about the Jets. nothing positive going on. they suck. i wouldn’t call them frauds because i came in thinking 7 wins.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:24 AM
And Reggie Bush is who Saints fans could have told you he is.
/ Clown
// Fraud
/// Knocker-upper of Kardashian-lite attention whores
November 16th, 2012 at 11:25 AM
?!?!?!?!?!
November 16th, 2012 at 11:26 AM
Charske thread:
http://www.thebiglead.com/index.php/2012/03/08/server-who-posted-peyton-mannings-50-restaurant-tip-on-the-internet-has-been-fired/
November 16th, 2012 at 11:27 AM
Scripty –
That link still comes up #3 when “Todd Charske” is Googled. Legend.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:28 AM
I think he means avoided reading posts by others about the Jets. Because he assumes they will all call the Jets frauds and anyone who likes the Jets clowns.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:28 AM
Bwahahaha this is hilarious. Such a bitter Jets fan. I love it. Almost as great as Hernia’s “[Totally Irrelevant Team] Is Horrible!!” posts.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:29 AM
I would do anything to be able to not root for the Dolphins.
/South Florida born and raised
November 16th, 2012 at 11:29 AM
I would. As their head coach that spouts about SB contention and kicking everyone’s ass around the field, they do very little of both. Picking up Tebow was icing on the cake, as if the transaction was the linchpin to their success this season.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:30 AM
Wish I had that but got under 6.5 and -150 vig on 5dimes… I can see them winning against Buffalo & Jacksonville at home. Possibly beating the Seahawks at home as well.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:30 AM
Remember that time when Jay Fiedler was the Dolphins QB? And he was the best QB they’ve had since Marino? Or was that Chad Pennington? A true toss-up
November 16th, 2012 at 11:32 AM
What an ordinary, turned extraordinary day.
/lights Charske bat signal
November 16th, 2012 at 11:32 AM
(doesn’t raise hand)
yea i’m good
November 16th, 2012 at 11:33 AM
WOW. Todd Charske, fraud.
-cracker jack
November 16th, 2012 at 11:36 AM
why the fuck did this asshole have to be from ohio? Spencer
November 16th, 2012 at 11:40 AM
I am NOT clicking on the next post. You fucking assholes.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:41 AM
http://thecrazygirlfriend.com/
been laughing like crazy
November 16th, 2012 at 11:41 AM
I’m with you, CJ. I like this site, but they can be tone deaf to fads that are two months expired. I fully expect a Call Me Maybe post later on this afternoon.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:42 AM
the cycle will be complete when you tell him he has weak gear and a played out haircut. please make it happen this weekend.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:43 AM
the cycle will be complete when you tell him he has weak gear and a played out haircut
Ask him what he does for a living the next time he complains about something.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:43 AM
WOW I miss smoking pot at work.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:44 AM
Broker Caught With Cocaine in Mortgage Fraud Raid
Todd H. Charske, 32, is the president and operations manager of Kemper Financial Inc. located in the Dayton, Ohio area. Charske and Gregory B. Romer, 27, are accused by FBI special agent Steven M. Darragh, of operating a flipping scheme and defrauding Meritage Mortgage Corporation. When lawmen raided Kemper’s offices, according to the Dayton Daily News, the mortgage fraud case turned unexpectedly into a drug case when Charske fled out the back door — allegedly with 328 grams of cocaine in a small plastic bucket — into the arms of an FBI agent.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:47 AM
That Charske thread just sucked me in for 15 minutes and I am only 1/2 through. Easily a top 5 thread in commenter history.
November 16th, 2012 at 11:49 AM
Holy shit. I never realized Todd Charske came back to that thread.
Todd Charske Says:
March 12th, 2012 at 10:24 PM
You guys need a life. keep going makes me laugh! Yes I admit the crap’s all made up the guy pissed me off a few times so I took everything I know about him and put it on the internet. Thanks for helping though keep it going. or not?!?!
November 16th, 2012 at 11:51 AM
that’s a clown statement, bro
November 16th, 2012 at 11:56 AM
Clown? Check
Fraud? Check
Multiple correct-when-made talking points with exclamation marks that now appear to be trending the opposite direction? Check
Keep chopping wood, JMac
November 16th, 2012 at 11:58 AM
i would vote for charske for president.
November 16th, 2012 at 12:01 PM
fuck, that Charske thread was epic. Gonna read it again tonight.
November 16th, 2012 at 12:07 PM
We come here for our Discount Clown Check. Jets…Dolphins…who’s next? Homey or Bozo?
November 16th, 2012 at 12:11 PM
I put down a couple of medium sized wagers on the Dolphins under 6.5 wins and the Redskins under 6.5 wins. Not sure I’ll win either one.
November 16th, 2012 at 12:15 PM
Charske thread:
http://www.thebiglead.com/index.php/2012/03/08/server-who-posted-peyton-mannings-50-restaurant-tip-on-the-internet-has-been-fired/
Thanks a lot Scripty…
November 16th, 2012 at 12:32 PM
Finished it. And he was the last comment. I can honestly say I’m still thoroughly confused
November 16th, 2012 at 12:56 PM
The Charske thread is legendary…and also includes this non-related gem from Steph:
I’m so grossed out. Was in the bathroom and office 8 was on the toilet talking on the phone AND EATING A SUBWAY SANDWICH. Watched her walk in while I was washing my hands, saw her go into the stall, heard her sit down and eventually start talking with her mouth full of food.
November 16th, 2012 at 1:04 PM
Spoiler: It was Charske. He’s a man, and a meme.
November 16th, 2012 at 1:06 PM
No, I was there live. Just finished re-reading