Chuck Hayes Compared the Lakers to The Avengers. Dwight Howard is the Hulk, Right?
Sacramento’s Chuck Hayes on the Lakers’ star-studded lineup: “”They’re like The Avengers out there.”
— Sekou Smith (@SekouSmithNBA) October 22, 2012
The Kings beat the Lakers Sunday night in Dwight Howard’s first game in a Los Angeles uniform. After the game, Kings 6’6″ center compared the Lakers to the Avengers. Considering the Kings beat the Lakers, I guess that makes the Kings Men in Black 3. (Or Snow White and the Huntsman. *waves at Jimmer*) As a blogger, Chuck Hayes has given me reason to create a listicle. I feel like we’ve done this before. Oh well.
Kobe Bryant is Iron Man because he thinks he’s better than everyone else. Also, both have an unhealthy obsession with Smush Parker.
Pau Gasol is Thor because look at that hair bro.
Steve Nash is Captain America because he is all that is good and pure and what is more American than a Canadian?
Ron Artest is Thing. Thing changed his name and had a short-lived career in stand up comedy.
Steve Blake is Black Panther because irony, you guys.
Earl Clark is Moondragon because he’ll never get in the game. Or the movie. Or some third thing.
Chris Duhon is Whizzer because that’s that’s a funny name.
Devin Ebanks is Kevin Eubanks because their names are similar and both their success depends on much more famous men. I guess he’s not really an Avenger, but that dude can play the bass. Did you know Kevin Eubanks is no longer with the Tonight Show? Does that make Kobe Bryant Jay Leno?
Dwight Howard is The Hulk because he’s a freak of nature and he never accomplished anything alone.
Andrew Goudelock is Hawkeye because we have to pretend somebody here is a great shot.
Jordan Hill is Falcon because I’m starting to get bored with this.
Antawn Jamison is A-Bomb because that’s what I would probably call my friend if his name was Antawn.
Darius Johnson-Odom is Ant-Man because they both have hyphens in their names. Sometimes these things write themselves.
Jodie Meeks is Black Widow because he has a girl’s name.
Darius Morris is Vance Astro. *shrugs*
Robert Sacre is Wasp because no one has heard of either of these guys.
Mike Brown is Nick fury because they both wear an eye patch.
Now it is your turn! Which Avengers do you think each Laker(s) is(are)!? Tell us in the comments!
Previously: Midnight Madness: Tom Izzo Was Iron Man, His Wife & Daughter Were Black Widow
Previously: If the 2012 Preakness Horses Were The Avengers, Who Would Be Their Favorite Characters From The Wire?

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30 Responses to “Chuck Hayes Compared the Lakers to The Avengers. Dwight Howard is the Hulk, Right?”
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October 23rd, 2012 at 12:18 PM
The Thing is only in New Avengers and New Avengers are gay as shit.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:19 PM
Also Marvel comics are fucking awful.
Miami is the Legion of Doom, though.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:20 PM
Avengers ….. meh.
/Team Dark Knight Rises.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:20 PM
great hulk-loki gif
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:20 PM
The Avengers sucked.
I would have turned it off, but it had decent reviews so I stuck with it. I was not happy with that decision.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:20 PM
you can like both, you know.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:23 PM
Avengers is what it is, a popcorn movie. Dark Knight Rises took itself too seriously and botched every serious part. Gotta give the edge to Avengers.
Real best superhero movie of the summer was of course The Raven.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:25 PM
Team DC?
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:26 PM
Kobe’s wife is Battle Cat because they are both Mexican.
/not true
/Masters of the Universe
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:26 PM
DC, Dark Horse, Image.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:27 PM
Nice. I just recently got back into comics. I’m reading a lot of DC stuff.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:34 PM
Dwight Howard is whatever marvel character gains power from sucking the fluids out of Whitney Houston’s rotted cavities.
/Dwight howard murped whitney houston
//fun with SEO and truth
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:36 PM
if dwight were a superhero, he’d be pussy lad.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:38 PM
I’d take moleman to be a fan of some obscure character like Machine Man or something.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:38 PM
Early 90s X-Men was freaking sweet. The whole “Fatal Attractions” series leading to [SPOILER ALERT] Wolverine getting the adamantium ripped from his skeleton and Magneto getting turned into a vegetable was freaking sweet.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:39 PM
And Colossus turning heel. That was a great “holy shit” moment.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:39 PM
deadpool is the best. no arguments.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:41 PM
Tin Tin is tragically under-rated.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:41 PM
I still pull this up once in a while. “Billowy Disco Jesus” always gets me
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:41 PM
the worst character ever has to be Aquaman, right? RIGHT?
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:42 PM
Going as Captain Haddock for Halloween, may never take off that costume.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:44 PM
Meanwhile..
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:48 PM
That’s another occasional go-to. Liefield is the WORST. And his thing about never drawing feet is really weird.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:50 PM
All sorts of false. Aquaman is criminally underrated.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:56 PM
worst character ever is superman.
HEY LETS GIVE HIM ALL THE EVERYTHING AND ONLY A TINY ROCK CAN HURT HIM. so stupid. they turned the homeric achilles archtype into a spandex clad buffoon.
October 23rd, 2012 at 12:59 PM
Wow. That guy does not like Rb Liefeld
October 23rd, 2012 at 1:02 PM
That was good.
October 23rd, 2012 at 1:03 PM
He and Batman are 1 and 1a. Aquaman probably takes the bronze. Unless the Green Arrow is relevant enough for me to hate on.
October 23rd, 2012 at 1:07 PM
All of this
October 23rd, 2012 at 1:31 PM
Aquaman > The Wonder Twins