People love power rankings, they love to trash them, rip them, complain about them, print them out and use as toilet paper. It’s a little rough for my taste, but I get it. So in an effort to do something different with the power rankings this year, we are going to be having a season long Big Brother style power rankings where each week, we vote off 1-2 teams out of the NFL Big Brother House, who have to go sit with the little kids. I don’t watch much reality TV, but I do have to admit that I’ve gotten hooked this year and am on Team Frank, which has caused plenty of arguments in the house.

It will work just like Big Brother with nominations. I will serve as the HOH (Head of Household) each week and the bottom five teams in the Big Brother rankings are on the block. I’ll then post a poll and you, the reader, will have an opportunity to vote for the team you want evicted. Just like Big Brother, though, there is Power of Veto. In this case, teams win the Veto if they actually win the following week, and they come off the block. The team with the highest vote total (or sometimes the top two teams) who then loses the following week is evicted. Teams can also gain immunity from the bottom five by beating a team ranked higher than them who is still alive in the Big Brother rankings the week before.

Other than that little twist, I’ll do the power rankings like normal. Once a team is evicted, though, they will be separately ranked in the Little Brother rankings. I will hope to avoid knee jerk reactions with teams, but also want the nominations to generally involve teams not playing well. By midseason, though, this could get interesting. Let’s hope you don’t vote out anyone that goes on to win the Super Bowl. We will try to have 12 survivors after week 17, and hopefully they will match the playoff teams.

We will start week one with just one removal at the end of next week’s games. Feel free to complain about anything in addition to my HOH nominations for the bottom five teams. My rankings are designed to be both predictive yet acknowledging past results. Think of it like where I think teams will end up by season’s end.

  1. New England Patriots
  2. Houston Texans
  3. San Francisco 49ers
  4. Baltimore Ravens
  5. Green Bay Packers
  6. Atlanta Falcons
  7. Chicago Bears
  8. Philadelphia Eagles
  9. New Orleans Saints
  10. Denver Broncos
  11. Dallas Cowboys
  12. New York Jets
  13. Detroit Lions
  14. New York Giants
  15. Pittsburgh Steelers
  16. San Diego Chargers
  17. Washington Redskins
  18. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
  19. Carolina Panthers
  20. Cincinnati Bengals
  21. Seattle Seahawks
  22. Minnesota Vikings
  23. Buffalo Bills
  24. Kansas City Chiefs
  25. Tennessee Titans
  26. Arizona Cardinals
  27. Jacksonville Jaguars
  28. Indianapolis Colts
  29. St. Louis Rams
  30. Cleveland Browns
  31. Oakland Raiders
  32. Miami Dolphins

If I were to put these teams in tiers, I would right now have about seven teams at the top, then a large group extending from #8 to #17 that are interchangeable. I know Pittsburgh is probably low at #15, and the same with the Giants at #14, and that both will get healthier. I played with a bunch of permutations, though, and none of them are satisfactory in this group, so we’ll just go with this. Don’t be surprised if there is a bunch of movement in this tier next week.

After that, I still believe in Carolina and that the offense will play better, and that Tampa will at least be competitive. I know that there will be an outcry for the Bills after the egg they laid last week. I don’t want to vote them out yet. I think they should be better than a lot of teams once the defense meshes. That Bills vs. Chiefs game Sunday could be to stay off the block in a week, though.

As for the nominations, Jacksonville survives as they almost won at Minnesota. Arizona stays off with their close win at home over Seattle. So the nominees are:

Indianapolis Colts – Yes, they lost by 20 at Chicago. I think they will improve as the season progresses, but they were 2-14 last year, and I think the upside is along the lines of what Carolina accomplished in the second half of last year.

St. Louis Rams – They have the worst record over the last five years, and have been historically bad, so including them here isn’t a stretch. Has Jeff Fisher turned things around? Well, they just lost in a close game at Detroit, but it took a pick six and two other interceptions in the red zone to keep it close.

Oakland Raiders – New coach, new GM, and an owner with the best hair this side of Tim Ryan. They couldn’t snap the ball last night, which kind of sums up their chances.

Cleveland Browns – This was an auto pick. The website software automatically inserted the Browns. Sorry, Cleveland fans.

Miami Dolphins – From Hard Knocks to out of the Big Brother house? Well, they aren’t exactly playing for now, the team lacks weapons at receiver for Ryan Tannehill, and it could be a long season for the triumvirate of Joe Philbin, Jeff Ireland, and Stephen Ross.

And now, it’s up to you (voting closes Thursday at first game time):

Who Should Be Evicted After Week 1?

  • Miami Dolphins (51%, 402 Votes)
  • Cleveland Browns (35%, 277 Votes)
  • Oakland Raiders (8%, 59 Votes)
  • St. Louis Rams (4%, 31 Votes)
  • Indianapolis Colts (2%, 15 Votes)

Total Voters: 784

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[photos via bigbrothernetwork.com, US Presswire]