The New England Patriots held their Kickoff Gala last night to celebrate the beginning of the season and Aaron Hernandez’s sweet new contract. The team also took the opportunity to embarrass their rookies by giving them horrible haircuts and making them mingle with rich, fancy people. As you can see, there are classic designs like a star in the back of the head and the “drunken frat boy.” Oh, wait – Is that a Zubaz design? I wonder which veteran did that one?

Here we have the Friar Tuck (or the Statue of Liberty that Tim Tebow famously sported as a rookie) and what appears to be a modified Costanza.

Finally, one unlucky rook had to sit there while a game of Tic-Tac-Toe was started – and then abandoned – on the back of his head. If you’re going to do that, why not complete the game? That seems more insulting than anything else. If anyone can identify any of these young fools, let us know and I’ll help the Patriots shame them.

[Patriots Facebook via @RapSheet]