Bartolo Colon is the Second Ex-Yankee to Fail a Drug Test in a Week

All, Baseball, Steroids Stephen Douglas August 22nd. 2012, 1:44pm

Bartolo Colon, the 2005 AL Cy Young winner, has failed a drug test according to Jon Heyman. [According to the MLB Twitter, he tested positive for testosterone.] Colon will likely join Melky Cabrera as the second player to receive a 50-game suspension in the last week. What is a pudgy pitcher like Colon doing taking steroids? In 2010, Colon was out of baseball with shoulder problems. He received a stem cell injection and came back to pitch for the Yankees last season. Colon has thrown 152 innings for the Oakland A’s this season, so the Nationals thought he should be shut down soon anyway. The A’s are just a half-game out of the wild card.

[CBS Sports]

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50 Responses to “Bartolo Colon is the Second Ex-Yankee to Fail a Drug Test in a Week”

1
DeusExMachina Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:47 PM
Bartolo Colon is the second Bay Area player to fail a drug test this week.
Bartolo Colon is the second Dominican to fail a drug test this week.
/narrative’d
2
ThatsSoTaguchi (Now With Zip) Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:48 PM
has failed a drug test according to Jon Heyman.
If it is coming from Heyman this is probably just some contractual ploy of Scott Boras.
3
Starscream Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:48 PM
He’s also the second player to have his last name start with C to fail a drug test this week.
4
cracker jack Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:48 PM
/narrative’d
Fine, but if AJ Burnett tests positive next week, I’m calling ‘trend’.
5
VladimirCrouton Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:49 PM
Can’t wait till Jeter gets busted. GIVE HIM A BLOOD TEST RIGHT NOW!!!
6
squawkbox Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:50 PM
Good call Douche … oops, I mean Deus.
Just kidding – seriously – I would put the West Coast and Dominican ties before the Yankee connection.
7
MaddMatt Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:51 PM
Bartolo Colon is the Second Ex-Yankee who never failed a test with said Yankees to Fail a Drug Test in a Week
8
Starscream Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:51 PM
Don’t forget Colon and Cabrera both have three kids.
9
geoffreyvs hired a PR firm to get his son's coach fired; now I'm running for Senate! Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:52 PM
Don’t forget Colon and Cabrera both have three kids.
And their last names both start with “C”
10
cracker jack Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:52 PM
Can’t wait till Jeter gets busted. GIVE HIM A BLOOD TEST RIGHT NOW!!!
He has to be handed his lifetime achievement award MVP first. Then it would be funnier.
11
Coach Mike Woodson, Atlanta Hawks Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:52 PM
Bartolo Colon is the Second Ex-Yankee who never failed a test with said Yankees to Fail a Drug Test in a Week
I think we all agree that the Yankees have perfected cheating.
12
Walking Underwear Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:52 PM
Fat
13
Worms82 Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:54 PM
Colon has thrown 152 innings for the Oakland A’s this season, so the Nationals thought he should be shut down soon anyway.
Well done sir.
I’ve been seeing this reported on twitter a lot as “tested positive for testosterone” but shouldn’t it be “tested positive for elevated levels of testosterone”? I mean, everyone in the MLB would test positive for testosterone you dummies
14
Nada Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:55 PM
/ OT
Per the South/south/Texas debate earlier: another reason why no sane person wants to be associated with Texas.
15
cracker jack Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:55 PM
I mean, everyone in the MLB would test positive for testosterone you dummies
Except Nick Punto
16
TarheelJTK Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:55 PM
I’ve been seeing this reported on twitter a lot as “tested positive for testosterone” but shouldn’t it be “tested positive for elevated levels of testosterone”? I mean, everyone in the MLB would test positive for testosterone you dummies
Not Josh Beckett.
17
Wide Word of Sport (?) Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:57 PM
Except Nick Punto
Not Josh Beckett.
Point to CJ. JTK, you gotta come stronger than that, with relevant linkage.
18
Wide Word of Sport (?) Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:58 PM
Second Ex-Yankee
This is particularly annoying and stupid, and I’m disappointed it came from you, Stephen. I expect it from other narrative-driven stupidity, but not your stuff.
19
TheFlyingElbow Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:59 PM
Looked like the definition of a steroid user to me.
20
mizerle06 is sarah phillips Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 1:59 PM
Bartolo Colon is the second Bay Area player to fail a drug test this week.
Bartolo Colon is the second Dominican to fail a drug test this week.
Bartolo Colon is the second player with 12 letters in his name to fail a drug test this week.
21
GloriousMullet beats jokes into the ground Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:00 PM
What a terrible last name
22
Wide Word of Sport (?) Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:01 PM
Bartolo Colon is the second player with 12 letters in his name to fail a drug test this week.
/starts counting
//takes off shoes and socks
///good point, Miz!
////puts Michael Trout on notice
23
RexKramerDangerSeeker Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:01 PM
Bartolo Colon is the second player with 12 letters in his name to fail a drug test this week.
His name is also an anagram for the other guy who failed.
24
cracker jack Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:03 PM
This is particularly annoying and stupid, and I’m disappointed it came from you, Stephen. I expect it from other narrative-driven stupidity, but not your stuff.
It really wasnt the first thing you thought of? Come on.
25
phillymantis915 Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:04 PM
////puts Michael Trout on notice
Dear God no….
26
Stephen Douglas (CRM!) Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:04 PM
This is particularly annoying and stupid, and I’m disappointed it came from you, Stephen. I expect it from other narrative-driven stupidity, but not your stuff.
/dying
27
Jason Lisk Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:04 PM
The Yankees breed cheaters? All the evidence I need. They should be disbanded.
/so it is written, so shall it be done.
28
VladimirCrouton Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:05 PM
The Yankees knowingly employee cheaters and encourage it.
29
RexKramerDangerSeeker Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:06 PM
I’m pretty sure Lisk just disbanded the Yankees. GO TRIBE!
30
cracker jack Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:07 PM
The Yankees knowingly employee cheaters and encourage it.
SHUT EM DOWN
31
Nada Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:07 PM
Mullet, pleased to the return of the true Mullet avatar.
32
The Stigs American Cousin Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:10 PM
Bartolo Colon is taking testosterone on advice from his doctors. It is pretty standard for all post-op trannies.
33
PeerLessPrices Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:13 PM
Sad. (for baseball, not pathetic donor sad)
34
Some Random Old Dude Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:13 PM
The Yankees breed cheaters? All the evidence I need. They should be disbanded.
Colon has thrown 152 innings for the Oakland A’s this season, so the Nationals thought he should be shut down soon anyway.
Youse guys make me laugh, even when I don’t wanna.
35
molemaninthemorning Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:13 PM
You people are seriously bitching about making fun of the Yankees?
36
Roethlishotdog Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:13 PM
Bartolo Colon, the 2005 AL Cy Young winner, has failed a drug test according to Jon Heyman. [According to the MLB Twitter, he tested positive for testosterone.]
I would have guessed Soul Glo
37
Worms82 Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:18 PM
The lack of surprise about this by everyone who even remotely follows baseball is an example of why maybe MLB should think about punishing teams for employing cheaters. Everyone figured Colon’s comeback was likely PED driven, Oakland and NY paid him anyway and got value from a pretty obvious cheater. MLB needs to do something to discourage that or the stink of PEDs will hang over the league forever.
38
GloriousMullet beats jokes into the ground Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:26 PM
Bartolo Colon is taking testosterone on advice from his doctors. It is pretty standard for all post-op trannies.
+1
Mullet, pleased to the return of the true Mullet avatar.
Back by popular demand
/swings on Jeremy Piven
39
sweett310 Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:29 PM
I would have guessed Soul Glo
Just let it shine through.
40
scripty Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:32 PM
The lack of surprise about this by everyone who even remotely follows baseball is an example of why maybe MLB should think about punishing teams for employing cheaters.
Bulk of these guys are pretty quiet about their usage. Not like the 90′s when guys dropping syringes in the clubhouse.
41
scripty Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:33 PM
/swings on Jeremy Piven
+1 wears four different hair pieces to confuse viewers about his rug
42
ohheelyeah Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:38 PM
This could have all been avoided had he not eaten another man whole and stored him in his belly in preparation for a cold winter.
/fatty
//fat fatty
43
Mantis Toboggan Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:39 PM
+1 wears four different hair pieces to confuse viewers about his rug
Pretty bad when the least amount of hair you’ve had in an acting career was in a college movie.
/can you blow me where the pampers is?
44
scripty Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:46 PM
Neil McCauley: Take off your shirt.
Doctor: My – my God – my daughter gave it to me for Father’s Day…
Neil McCauley: I don’t give a shit who gave it to you, take it off!
/owned
45
squawkbox Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 2:57 PM
This is particularly annoying and stupid, and I’m disappointed it came from you, Stephen. I expect it from other narrative-driven stupidity, but not your stuff.
/dying
Wow. You must have cred or something. My criticism of a CRM post was met with the wrath of the equivalent of a 39 yr old mother of five with PMS.
46
scripty Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:15 PM
thought about this the other day
Colon is still pitching, yet Cliff Lee, Sizemore and Brandon Phillps are done with the Tribe, yielding them nothing but Lou Marson. And Colon had a decent year before this. So it looks like the Tribe lost this one.
47
Jake Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:26 PM
that headline is an absolute joke
48
molemaninthemorning Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:52 PM
Say one more word about me wearing a toupee, I swear to fucking god.
49
gillisunited Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:55 PM
46Jake Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:26 PM
that headline is an absolute joke
The headline is pretty on point if you ask me
50
Nada Says:
August 22nd, 2012 at 3:56 PM
I always thought I’d give Piven a lifetime pass for PCU and playing George on Seinfeld within Seinfeld, but revocation may be looming.