Mark Herzlich Wants You to Know His Female Friend Does Not Have Implants
Mark Herzlich, the former Boston College linebacker now with the Giants, went boating over the holiday weekend in Jersey and tweeted out some photos. As you can imagine, some of his 91,000 followers had some questions about the female in the red top. Herzlich responded to one: “I promise you they are not fake.” [via Busted Coverage]
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May 29th, 2012 at 3:19 PM
“If I can touch them, they’re real”.
/New Godzilla Biscuits?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:20 PM
She…will…NEVER…drown.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:21 PM
“No, I said hand me the buoys…”
May 29th, 2012 at 3:22 PM
Killer rap duo about to hit the scene, y’all.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:22 PM
good for him…he deserves some titties like that.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:22 PM
“I promise you they are not fake.”
One way to tell: have her take the top off and then bend over. Then you look at the side for ripples.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:25 PM
is that a tumor in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
oh, just happy to see me?
…well, don’t i feel like an asshole.
/damn optimistic cancer survivors…THEY’RE JUST SO SMUG
May 29th, 2012 at 3:26 PM
The coloring is weird because it’s an Instagram thing right?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:26 PM
Boston College, the Giants… I want to hate Herzlich, I really do, but it’s impossible.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:27 PM
He’s either lying or functionally retarded.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:28 PM
oh my
/team ass
May 29th, 2012 at 3:28 PM
dude has to swim move just to kiss her.
and since when is real vs fake relevant?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:29 PM
They look like they’re in a Technicolor movie.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:30 PM
The coloring is weird because it’s an Instagram thing right?
Hipstamatic is easily the least-used app on my phone.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:30 PM
He’s either lying or functionally retarded.
Or he’s seen that bikini top undone and watched her nipples kiss her knee caps
May 29th, 2012 at 3:31 PM
@DConti710 that her?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:32 PM
Those are fucking sweet. Damn bro. Jersey broads rule..
May 29th, 2012 at 3:33 PM
Tonster Mitties.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:34 PM
But she has the mouth of a bass….
May 29th, 2012 at 3:34 PM
What he said.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:34 PM
Absolutely not. And I am married to a Jersey broad.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:34 PM
and?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:36 PM
I have grown to appreciate the female ass quite a bit in the last five years, but personally the ranking remains 1. boobs 2. ass 3. legs (really as long as she doesn’t have cankles it’s fine).
May 29th, 2012 at 3:36 PM
and since when is real vs fake relevant?
I concur, it’s the ultimate 1st World Problem.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:37 PM
Ass
Legs
Stomach
Boobs
May 29th, 2012 at 3:38 PM
Jersey broads rule..
Fuck no they don’t. They are the worst.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:39 PM
Ass
Legs
Stomach
Boobs
When did stomach enter into the traditional ranking? Tell me Husker, do you moonlight on here as FredSanford?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:40 PM
I do not, but a sexy stomach on a woman is one of life’s great joys. Not ass or legs good, but good nonetheless.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:42 PM
Ass
Legs
Stomach
Boobs
If Boobs and Ass are not 1/2 in some order, you are outside of your mind.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:42 PM
Ass
Legs
Stomach
Boobs
So Face is 5th???? Dang.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:44 PM
Fuck they dont. Jersey leads all states in broads giving blow jobs and fucking in bars and cars. Thats why the rule. Ive lived in multiple states and have never seen so many chicks willing to give head in bars or outside bars to me or my friends in my life. Goes like this: Hey you wanna go outside. Ok Lets go. No room needed nothing. Its like ordering fucking pizza.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:44 PM
Or from another culture.
/team lower lip
May 29th, 2012 at 3:45 PM
she may not have them now, but she’ll need them in 20 years
regardless, YOWZA
May 29th, 2012 at 3:46 PM
Ok then. I was aspiring a little higher, but if that works for you, then more power to you.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:46 PM
Ass
Legs
Stomach
Boobs
So Face is 5th???? Dang.
Face should be #1 on any long term potential. Tits and Ass trump Face in the strictly sex-hot conversation.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:47 PM
Ass/legs
Face
Tits
Tits are the easiest to fill in later.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:48 PM
Despite the large sunglasses on both of them obscuring an official ranking…I am going to give the nod to the black bathing suit.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:48 PM
One of the best fashion trends of the last 15 years is chicks buying bikini tops that are 3 sizes too small, then shoehorning their cans into them. God Bless America.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:48 PM
Fuck they dont. Jersey leads all states in broads giving blow jobs and fucking in bars and cars. Thats why the rule. Ive lived in multiple states and have never seen so many chicks willing to give head in bars or outside bars to me or my friends in my life. Goes like this: Hey you wanna go outside. Ok Lets go. No room needed nothing. Its like ordering fucking pizza.
ddmcd1974 is approaching Legend status. Unfortunately, he hasn’t accumulated the minimum number of post required to be considered.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:51 PM
Ass
Boobs
Legs
Face
Dong
/Coop’d
May 29th, 2012 at 3:51 PM
“SHoehorning their cans into them”. That was awesome.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:52 PM
Face should be #1 on any long term potential.
i would put sanity over face.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:53 PM
You’ll do just fine here.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:53 PM
Fuck they dont. Jersey leads all states in broads giving blow jobs and fucking in bars and cars. Thats why the rule. Ive lived in multiple states and have never seen so many chicks willing to give head in bars or outside bars to me or my friends in my life. Goes like this: Hey you wanna go outside. Ok Lets go. No room needed nothing. Its like ordering fucking pizza.
ddmcd1974 is approaching Legend status. Unfortunately, he hasn’t accumulated the minimum number of post required to be considered.
Agreed. He needs to comment more.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:54 PM
One of the best fashion trends of the last 15 years is chicks buying bikini tops that are 3 sizes too small, then shoehorning their cans into them.
it’s not that they’re too small, it’s the style of top. they make bikini tops now that are “push up” or padded a certain way to create a more desirable appearance.
/got the run down from the gf 3 weeks ago
May 29th, 2012 at 3:55 PM
I also give positive marks for these ladies not doing that duck bill thing.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:56 PM
one of the best fashion trends of the last 15 years were zoot suits.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:56 PM
Good lawd those are some fat ol’ titties
May 29th, 2012 at 3:57 PM
Here here x 1000000.
May 29th, 2012 at 3:58 PM
Face should be #1 on any long term potential.
i would put sanity over face.
Well yea but can you tell which of these chicks is saner from this pic?
May 29th, 2012 at 3:58 PM
TJ/
List of new characters for Game of Thrones Season 3. Some interesting and well-sought-after names in there.
/TJ
May 29th, 2012 at 4:00 PM
Well yea but can you tell which of these chicks is saner from this pic?
it’s a trick question… no female is sane.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:05 PM
I don’t know, man. I’ve seen a trend where chicks are just pouring out of those tops. It doesn’t look all that comfortable, and they probably have to spend the entire day worrying about a tit popping out, but I appreciate their sacrifice. Thankfully men can wear comfortable shit like board shorts.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:13 PM
When did stomach enter into the traditional ranking? Tell me Husker, do you moonlight on here as FredSanford?
I think it’s been established that I am not on the stomach team I’m more brain and boobs.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:13 PM
I do not, but a sexy stomach on a woman is one of life’s great joys. Not ass or legs good, but good nonetheless.
Damnit Husker … you’re usually such a fucktard here but now you go and post something like that and force me to agree. Jackass.
/Fails at feigning hate
May 29th, 2012 at 4:14 PM
Boobs are fucking awesome. As far as physical rankings:
Face
Boobs
Ass
Legs
May 29th, 2012 at 4:17 PM
Face is a given. That is #1. That’s a pre-req.
As for the rest:
1a: Boobs
1b: Ass
2: Legs
A great 1a or 1b can balance out the other being subpar.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:18 PM
Do you guys really need to rank Ass and Legs separately? Like when was the last time you saw a chick with a bangin ass and thought “if only her legs were nicer”? Usually those go hand in hand.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:20 PM
I’ve seen a lot of girls with great legs and no ass.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:22 PM
Do you guys really need to rank Ass and Legs separately? Like when was the last time you saw a chick with a bangin ass and thought “if only her legs were nicer”? Usually those go hand in hand.
Valid point, legs and ass usually are similar. Just depends on your take.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:23 PM
Absolutely. If they have a nice ass the legs usually follow suit, but it doesn’t always go the other way.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:25 PM
Like when was the last time you saw a chick with a bangin ass and thought “if only her legs were nicer”?
I’ve seen a lot of girls with great legs and no ass.
But that’s not my question, because clearly you’re not going after the chick with all legs and no ass. So why rank the legs at all?
May 29th, 2012 at 4:30 PM
Clearly you’ve never had alcohol.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:31 PM
<em/New Godzilla Biscuits?
no, there is only one
May 29th, 2012 at 4:38 PM
It’s like you respond to a Godzilla Biscuits bat signal.
May 29th, 2012 at 4:42 PM
because clearly you’re not going after the chick with all legs and no ass
Clearly you’ve never had alcohol.
Ha, when I’m wearing my Brad Clooney mask I’m dead sober!
May 29th, 2012 at 4:49 PM
Face doesnt mean squat unless your looking for a girlfriend. Cmon man wtf. If your in a bar and you see a pretty face with a flat ass and mosquito bites for a chest and then you see some sweet round pie wit 36D chesticles you tell me your planning your night around tryin to impress the flat ass no tit broad to saddle up later? Get the fuck outta here. Your goin all in for the bazookas. Your drunk no one gives a shit about a face when your leavin an hour after poundin…
May 29th, 2012 at 4:52 PM
Mark Herzlich, the former Boston College linebacker now with the Giants, went motorboating
/corrected
May 29th, 2012 at 4:53 PM
Except for the whole your/you’re situation, I agree wholeheartedly
May 29th, 2012 at 4:56 PM
They’re real and they’re spectacular!
May 29th, 2012 at 4:57 PM
Yeah, … they feel like… a bag of sand.
May 29th, 2012 at 7:48 PM
Respect that man.
May 29th, 2012 at 8:58 PM
1. Face
2. Boobs
3. Legs
4. Stomach
5. Ass
My wife crushes the first 2. And don’t think I’m naysaying the joys of a nice ass by putting it last. It’s just that I’ve been with my wife (dating-married) for more than seven years and she hasn’t really had an ass to speak of. Can any of the other married guys speak to this? You’re with a woman so long that they sort of subtly shape things you find attractive in other women?
May 30th, 2012 at 2:14 PM
Good for him.