Joe Smith is a pitcher for the Cleveland Indians. That was his answer when a bar in Ohio asked him for identification, because, really, why should an MLB player be asked to show identification like a mere peasant? It didn’t go well.

Bar security did not accept that answer, and one of the people with Smith told police “Roundhouse security became rude and disrespectful.”

It was at this point in Smith’s explanation of events to police that the officer remarked in the report that “Mr. Smith became upset with me because I did already not know who he was.”

The report then said that the pitcher’s girlfriend leaned forward and stated, “He’s a pitcher for the Cleveland Indians!”

Incidentally, the “pitcher’s girlfriend” via the police report is Allie LaForce, who is both the 2005 Miss Teen USA winner and a sports reporter for the FOX affiliate in Cleveland.

LaForce’s mother, also present during the incident, tried to offer the police officers money, from a wad of Benjamins.

But before they left, the police report stated that the mother of Smith’s friend “held out a large folded stack of $100 bills to Ofc. Williams and said ‘Can you guys take a tip?’”

The officer explained to the woman that “we would not be taking any gratuities,” according to the report.

No charges were filed. Having an inflated sense of self-worth, in isolation, is no crime. Not sure what the precise protocol is for pulling a “do you know who I am,” though I would guess you’d have to be at least a starter. Not even Miguel Cabrera could pull that off.

I’ll make sure to have my wife try out “He’s a writer for The Big Lead” during my next encounter with law enforcement.

[Photos via Presswire, Getty]