Lenny Dykstra Has Been Sentenced to 3 Years in Prison
Frequently embattled screwball, Lenny Dykstra was sentenced today to three years in a California state prison after a judge rejected the former Met’s request to withdraw a no-contest plea. This was the grand theft auto trial. You know, the one where he and two accomplices were charged with trying to “lease and then sell high-end cars from several auto dealerships by claiming credit through a phony business.” That old bit.
The honorable Dykstra isn’t done just yet as he will stand trial this summer for federal bankruptcy charges.
For the time being, the hope is that Nails will make some productive use of his three-year stint and become the greatest imprisoned baseball player since California Penal’s Ricky Vaughn.
[via Adam Rubin]
Previously: Lenny Dykstra Is Still Crazy
Previously: Lenny Dykstra Formally Charged With Possession of Cocaine and Ecstasy
Previously: Lenny Dykstra Tried To Break Dwight Gooden Out Of Rehab Because Why Wouldn’t He?
Previously: Lenny Dykstra Interviews Housekeeper, Allegedly Requests Nude Massage
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March 5th, 2012 at 4:01 PM
+1
March 5th, 2012 at 4:02 PM
Lenny = White
Carl = Black
March 5th, 2012 at 4:04 PM
strike two
adjusts gloves, adjusts helmet, adjusts cup, spits, steps back in
strike three
bitches at ump, gets fucked by a large gang member
March 5th, 2012 at 4:05 PM
At least he’ll have a roof over his head now.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:06 PM
the greatest imprisoned baseball player since California Penal’s Ricky Vaughn.
Pete Rose was in jail in 1990. Ricky Vaughn was out of jail by March ’87 to make spring training, to get to camp so the movie could get made for 1988 release.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:08 PM
Thanks for 1993, Lenny.
Watch out for your corn hole, bud.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:09 PM
the greatest imprisoned baseball player since California Penal’s Ricky Vaughn. Great….:)
March 5th, 2012 at 4:10 PM
William Buford just blazed another three.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:11 PM
it’s all old man selig’s fault
/scripty
March 5th, 2012 at 4:12 PM
tree, another tree
March 5th, 2012 at 4:12 PM
it’s all old man selig’s fault
/scripty
oh, keep it in one post, you old hens
March 5th, 2012 at 4:14 PM
Meh. I think Lenny’s gonna blast some butt cheeks all the way to the top.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:15 PM
First draft pick of the All-Chew Team.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:17 PM
Man, bloggers are going to miss you big time, Lenny.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:17 PM
Last pick, Tony Gwynn.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:18 PM
First draft pick of the All-Chew Team.
Round that team out please. ManRam would get my vote.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:19 PM
First draft pick of the All-Chew Team.
Off the top of my head (including dip — yes, there is a difference)
Bonds, Sheffield, Kendall, Schilling, Chipper Jones, Warren Sapp
March 5th, 2012 at 4:20 PM
Utley the 2B on that team?
March 5th, 2012 at 4:20 PM
I’d put Nick Swisher on the All-Chew team. Manny absolutely as well. Trying to think of the pitchers that were the biggest dippers.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:20 PM
Mickey Tettleton.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:21 PM
Tito Francona has to be the manager of that team.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:21 PM
I’d take Gywnn before Roger Ebert.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:22 PM
Some guys have an outrageous long system of taking big league chew, the layering in chew, more gum, etc. Gotta be some closers/relievers that come to mind. Paul Assenmacher, legend back in the day.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:22 PM
man I wish there was a website that had a dipping hall of fame.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:24 PM
Emmitt Smith and Warren Sapp co-own the NFL’s dipping crown.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:24 PM
dipping hall of fame.
I had a pretty epic run from 98-10. Was going strong at about 2x logs a week.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:24 PM
“This is a guy who is applying the same skills to money as he applied to sports. It’s brilliant…I think people don’t think of Lenny as sophisticated. But I am telling you, Bernie, that not only is he sophisticated, but he’s one of the great ones in this business. He’s one of the great ones.” — Jim Cramer
March 5th, 2012 at 4:27 PM
Pat Burrell – legend
March 5th, 2012 at 4:27 PM
“How’d you end up playing there?”
“Stole a car.”
March 5th, 2012 at 4:29 PM
Jim Cramer
How that guy has any credibility left after this and after Daily Show eviscerated him, I do not know.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:30 PM
shit man, that is a lot. at my best I was about a can every 3 days and I thought my lower jaw was going to fall off. I “quit” about 2 years ago, although every year around hunting season I find myself picking up a can about once a week.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:36 PM
How does Jim Cramer have a show? He’s annoying and dumb.
/Checks listings to see that there are 3 storage/auctions shows on plus a show about parking enforcement. And Snooki.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:37 PM
he’s known as bird selig around these parts.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:38 PM
Somebody explain the differnce as non-grossly as possible between, dip chew, chaw, etc.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:43 PM
Chew is usually longer cut stuff. Dip is more finely cut. Snuff is very finely cut (or possibly ground?)
But you do the same thing with it no matter what: take a pinch and put it between your lip and gum. And don’t swallow.
March 5th, 2012 at 4:45 PM
I’m finally seeing the site issues … when I first arrive I see the first Championship Week post as the latest. When I click into something, all is resolved. Frustrating.
March 5th, 2012 at 5:00 PM
How that guy has any credibility left after this and after Daily Show eviscerated him, I do not know.
Hopefully not a lot of people take financial advice from a dork that acts like a cross between a morning radio DJ and a circus clown
/honk honk!