The Wall Street Journal did a story yesterday on the somewhat obsessive use of at-bat music in baseball. Mets utility man Willie Harris, an unproductive player with oodles of time on his hands, was noted as taking great satisfaction in picking out specific songs for players other than himself, like “Otis” by Jay-Z and Kanye, which Harris chose for Jose Reyes because of the lyrics ‘I got my swagger back, I’m back.’ For players like David Wright, it’s not a big deal. He lets his two brothers in on the fun by allowing them to select 30-second sound bytes to varying degrees of dramatic impact. The aforementioned Reyes, however, spends two weeks in the offseason zeroing in on multiple crowd-pleasing entrances:

Reyes probably has the most involved selection process. For a period of about two weeks during the offseason, he conducts research. That means reviewing his extensive music collection, polling his friends, and casting a wide net for new music. He said he has to weigh “what is hot, what is in the moment,” what might be popular with fans and what contains “some positive message for the people … It takes me a long time to figure it out, because it has to be perfect, man,” he added.

Sounds a bit ridiculous for someone who should really be stretching their problematic hammys, but I’d almost rather a player spend a little time selecting something interesting rather than do what Jason Giambi still does, which is to approach the batter’s box with the utterly ridiculous NWO Wolfpac theme song jamming away. Not even the original NWO, but NWO Wolfpac. Embarrassing, but very Giambi.

It’s not entirely clear what year the at-bat music phenomenon began spreading throughout baseball, but I do know who set the tone and very well might have started it all. In his first and only season with the Mets back in 2000, Derek Bell came up to the plate using Jay-Z’s “Big Pimpin’” for each and every at-bat. It was perfect, not to mention hilarious. The beginning seconds of that song are so unmistakable and party flavored, I remain stunned there isn’t one player in baseball who currently uses it:

One surprising takeaway from the article is that there are no specific guidelines from MLB in regard to what can and can’t be played other than to “use good judgement.” That’s an awfully loose, hopeful assumption considering Bud Selig has his fingerprints on everything else like they were the last set of tits roaming the earth.

Which brings me to this … if they can play anything as long as the tune isn’t offensive, why haven’t characters like Logan Morrison, Nyjer Morgan or Nick Swisher done something humorous, like use sitcom music? The theme to “Golden Girls” would be tremendous and surprisingly apt. I can’t think of any better way to connect with the fans than have “thank you for bein’ a friend…” thunderously blaring throughout the stadium. So this is my official request to do just that. It must happen:

A Player’s Big Decision: Intro Music [Wall Street Journal]