North Korean Players Test Positive For Steroids At Women’s World Cup | Big Lead Sports

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North Korean Players Test Positive For Steroids At Women’s World Cup

All, Soccer, Steroids, Women's Sports, World Cup Stephen Douglas July 16th. 2011, 12:00pm

In a story that I could not have dreamed up myself, five North Korean women have tested positive for steroids. FIFA president Sepp Blatter is as shocked as I am.

“This is a shock,” Blatter said at a news conference. “We are confronted with a very, very bad case of doping and it hurts.”

FIFA hates scandal. They just won’t stand for it. Of course, the North Koreans have an explanation.

FIFA has already met with a North Korean delegation and heard arguments that the steroids were accidentally taken with traditional Chinese medicines based on musk deer glands to treat players who had been struck by lightning on June 8 during a training camp.

Musk deer glads? Accidental steroid use? Struck by lightning? This cannot be real. I must have been redirected to The Onion.

[ESPN, Getty]

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12 Responses to “North Korean Players Test Positive For Steroids At Women’s World Cup”

1
KC Resident Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:19 PM
Fantastic. I use musk deer glands as a suppository so obviously the North Koreans are lying.
2
traderjack21 Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:38 PM
I’d go for every girl on the U.S. team before going near one of the North Korean players.
/ROID RAGE
3
Groin Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:43 PM
I wonder if they got free bowls of soup with those haircuts.
4
Chief Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:43 PM
I’d go for every girl on the U.S. team before going near one of the North Korean players.
/ROID RAGE
Really? Roids is the reason? Did you look at the photo above – roids or not, I wouldn’t go near any of them.
5
YYSA Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:54 PM
Koreans are the definitely the ugliest asians. Like white people from Michigan.
6
Off The Backboard (karma) Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:54 PM
The only one that even looks remotely feminine is the goalie. and I’m assuming this was a “before steroids” picture.
Yikes.
7
Gaseous Clay Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 12:56 PM
Koreans are the definitely the ugliest asians.
those 11 certainly are.
8
José Ovechkin Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 1:05 PM
I usually love Korean women. But these…are fucking terrible looking
9
traderjack21 Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 1:06 PM
Koreans are the definitely the ugliest asians
South Korea has some nice ladies.
and Chief, the roid rage was just an unrelated sidebar to my comment
10
José Ovechkin Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 1:09 PM
Like white people from Michigan.
Kate Upton makes that statement look stupid. As does that blonde chick with the huge tits in that hair whip car video
11
jim Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 1:20 PM
So North Korea is the new East Germany now?
12
yorwifesahor Says:
July 16th, 2011 at 3:28 PM
Fantastic. I use musk deer glands as a suppository so obviously the North Koreans are lying.
That’s a shitty thing to say

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