Luis Suarez Bit an Opponent in the Neck, and the Announcers Called Him Mike Tyson
Luis Suarez, upset about something that happened on the pitch, decided to bite an opponent in the neck. He was suspended for two games, but could get seven more. Clearly, Suarez was raised by vampires or was trying to impress Mike Tyson.
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November 24th, 2010 at 10:31 AM
We’ve all seen those teeth. Deadly weapons.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:34 AM
to those of you losing money on Andy Roddick right now, rest assured, I’m losing more. He’s being handed his ass, and may have just given up.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:35 AM
this is only the second shittiest move Suarez has pulled this year, too. What a horse faced asshole.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:35 AM
a soccer player compared to mike tyson? pssh.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:38 AM
I believe that’s called a hickey.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:39 AM
what a couple of tools
November 24th, 2010 at 10:39 AM
SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!
He looked like that zombie that took the eventual death bite out of Amy on The Walking Dead on Sunday.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:40 AM
Not sure what is worse, the guy doing the biting or the guy whining to the ref about it. Some fool bites you on the pitch/field/ice, you retaliate.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:42 AM
strahan
November 24th, 2010 at 10:42 AM
Frank Deford should bite him back, or suck his blood.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:44 AM
Not sure what is worse, the guy doing the biting or the guy whining to the ref about it. Some fool bites you on the pitch/field/ice, you retaliate.
Hockey fights > football fights > baseball fights > basketball fights > soccer ‘fights’
November 24th, 2010 at 10:44 AM
I must be lame because I totally was not expecting all that.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:45 AM
loving the new SuperCuts ads on here. can i get a coupon?
November 24th, 2010 at 10:45 AM
What’s the over/under on minutes it takes him to finish an ear of corn on the cob?
November 24th, 2010 at 10:47 AM
Longer than you think because he’s got to go back and eat the row of kernels that escape through the gap.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:47 AM
4 minutes. Then 2 minutes to floss with a Buick Park Avenue.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:48 AM
Nah, you’re good. I think almost every character sans Deputy Rick is free to become zombie food. Even Shane and Lori. Seriously.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:49 AM
i think carl* is off limits too.
*what a dumb name for a kid on a tv show…
November 24th, 2010 at 10:50 AM
What pitch? Looks like soccer and not baseball to me.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:50 AM
That was the joke…
November 24th, 2010 at 10:50 AM
I still can’t watch it though without thinking of him in Love Actually.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:51 AM
You know what’s coming…
November 24th, 2010 at 10:51 AM
It’s the south, bro.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:52 AM
Please tell me you’re not referring to the handball. That was a brilliant move, actually.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:52 AM
Ah, my bad. I thought the joke was in reference to his enormous mouth.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:53 AM
spencer dick. at least i have an excuse…my parents smoked a lot of pot.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:53 AM
The only Carl worth knowing…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InkiqIaq4rU
November 24th, 2010 at 10:54 AM
Carl Winslow is at the top of Carl mountain: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgNj1nPh97Y&feature=related
November 24th, 2010 at 10:55 AM
Just caught up on Walking Dead. I’m gonna stick it out but the series to me has been horribly dissapointing. **SPOILER** okay, one dude gets heat stroke and lost his family and feels bad when he sees he was scaring kids. WE GET IT, THERE IS A HUMAN ELEMENT. They take 10 minutes of the show to hammer this point home. Get to the f’n point. Even at the end when the camp is attacked I’m like, okay, finally some zombie action.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:56 AM
Carl Carlson.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:56 AM
Clay. No way you lose 2 in a row. Tell me who you are betting next, please. Shouldve known better than to trust Mr Decker.
November 24th, 2010 at 10:57 AM
Well that’s a different joke altogether, how else is he gonna fit 3 cocks in his mouth?
/cuz he’s gay you see
November 24th, 2010 at 10:57 AM
“E. Gordon Gee”
November 24th, 2010 at 10:59 AM
maybe there’s another level of zombie love, but i don;t get the fascination. shaun of the dead and zombieland threw in some humor, 28 days later, 30 days of night and i am legend were great and had new twists, but how much can you wring out of dead folks eating people and only being killed by total destruction?
November 24th, 2010 at 10:59 AM
lol…totally unprovoked.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:00 AM
Carl Spackler and this cannot be debated
November 24th, 2010 at 11:00 AM
He’s a real asshole for having that name.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:00 AM
listen to this guy complain about sausage.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:01 AM
We established that is not a zombie movie.
Quite a bit acutally, because people are fascinated with the end of the world coming via zombies. The thing is it has been done so much if you don’t do it well, it comes off as lame.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:02 AM
“It’s like playing nude musical chairs with Skynet”
November 24th, 2010 at 11:02 AM
I don’t know, this one is pretty good as well.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:02 AM
anyone with an initial like that is an asshole. i say we round em up starting with this “JP Morgan Chase” asshole.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:02 AM
Clay. No way you lose 2 in a row. Tell me who you are betting next, please. Shouldve known better than to trust Mr Decker.
I feel pretty stupid about that one, after the fact. After the way Roddick lost Monday, only a moron would tell people to bet on him.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:05 AM
28 days later,
We established that is not a zombie movie.
tell that to the eaten
November 24th, 2010 at 11:06 AM
Carl Spackler and this cannot be debated
I agree with the old man. So I got that going for me. Which is nice.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:07 AM
SPOILER:
Yeah, NDub, that chick that got zombied was so obviously going to get zombied after they spent half the show bonding the two sisters, and then for sure after the birthday present bullshit.
And the premonition guy, that was very ham handed. What are these long deep square holes you’re obsessively digging, and why can’t us humans who would fit in them nicely figure that out.
The only thing that would be awesome is if Merle brought those zombies to the mountaintop in the moving van for revenge.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:08 AM
Clay. No way you lose 2 in a row. Tell me who you are betting next, please. Shouldve known better than to trust Mr Decker.
I feel pretty stupid about that one, after the fact. After the way Roddick lost Monday, only a moron would tell people to bet on him.
lost all my cents, second straight day
November 24th, 2010 at 11:09 AM
That is what we thought happened.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:09 AM
all dis right hurr.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:09 AM
I mean, I can only guess as to how I would react during a zombie apocalypse, but I have to believe that wrapping a present would fall wayyyy down there on the importance list. I did like the idea of keeping track what day it was though, I’d have to do that to stay sane.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:12 AM
I mean, I can only guess as to how I would react during a zombie apocalypse,
Don’t follow Spencer and SG.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:13 AM
I mean, I can only guess as to how I would react during a zombie apocalypse
I know I would definitely go on beating my wife, or being a total racist. But if I was a chick? I’d miss my dad a lot, and bang d00ds who told me my husband was dead.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:13 AM
Clay – The show is what it is. If you don’t like it, then stop watching it.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:14 AM
Do you think if any animals didn’t get completely eaten they would become zombies also?
November 24th, 2010 at 11:16 AM
lost all my cents, second straight day
it’s so hard to get started. Especially when you get desperate, and you’re picking a soccer game at random because you’ve heard of one team and not the other. I’ve spent most of the past two days betting my whole stack on overwhelming money line favorites, because that’s how you play at this level. It’s not that fun in terms of risk/reward.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:16 AM
I think the one of the basic Romero zombie rules are that animals can get eaten, but don’t turn into zombies.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:17 AM
Do you think if any animals didn’t get completely eaten they would become zombies also?
animals are zombies already, gg. they’d eat people if we let them and made them hungry enough
November 24th, 2010 at 11:17 AM
Nice.
They’ve done this in other zombie movies. Resident Evil with the dogs and birds. Though considering it is usually cited as a virus that causes the zombification, it could be said that it is a human virus only.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:19 AM
that’s bullshit.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:19 AM
Though considering it is fiction that causes the zombification, it could be said that anything you fucking want to make up is possible.
fixed for SAG
November 24th, 2010 at 11:20 AM
Clay – The show is what it is. If you don’t like it, then stop watching it.
I thought we were talking about it. I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to talk about it.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:21 AM
Spence, he’s saying that because he’s totally jealous that our plan is so well thought out and awesome.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:22 AM
that’s bullshit.
Ha. I was expecting an expletive laced tirade.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:23 AM
Okay, even if you told me he was dead, I still wouldn’t be that cavalier about banging his best friend. She just seems like she had no feelings for her supposedly dead husband at all.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:23 AM
Geez- I don’t think you ever told us your solution to a zombeapacalypse
November 24th, 2010 at 11:24 AM
It’s not like that.
It’s pretty clear you don’t like it, and that’s fine, so why keep watching it and bringing up how much you think it sucks?
Most people who don’t like TV shows stop watching them.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:25 AM
Geez- I don’t think you ever told us your solution to a zombeapacalypse
Inland castle, very cold locale to allow for scavenging/zombie smashing in the winter months. Stay the fuck away from the water.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:25 AM
Ndub- me with Lost
November 24th, 2010 at 11:26 AM
this.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:26 AM
She just seems like she had no feelings for her supposedly dead husband at all.
she needs to get those clothes off and bathe in that lake before they go.
I don’t get how the other guys aren’t sniffing around at those two sisters, looking to repopulate the earth, or at least take a couple of pumps at it. It’s weird how they cast some people as horny goats, and some as sentimental fools.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:26 AM
Most people who don’t like TV shows stop watching them.
dirt isn’t most people. He’s here to crush souls
/high fives dirt
November 24th, 2010 at 11:27 AM
I haven’t watched this week’s episode yet but I was under the impression she was banging the best friend before he was in a coma. There was a reference to them having problems in their marriage at the beginning of the first episode.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:27 AM
I thought she was pretty quick to jump another guy’s bones. The only thing I can think of is that the writers are trying to go unconventional with us because this is afterall an apocolypse. People probably don’t act normal while they’re clinging to humanity and sanity. Shane is Rick’s best friend, and Lori is probably very close to him because of that. Maybe fear drove her into his arms. I think there’s more to that storyline that we’ll learn about.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:28 AM
Spence, he’s saying that because he’s totally jealous that our plan is so well thought out and awesome.
Read World War Z and then we can discuss whether your plan is well thought out.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:29 AM
It’s pretty clear you don’t like it, and that’s fine, so why keep watching it and bringing up how much you think it sucks?
Most people who don’t like TV shows stop watching them.
I like watching television, and I like watching shows that other people are watching . It gives me commonality with people here. If I only watched the shows I liked, I would be watching two or three shows and that’s it.
If you don’t like the comments I make about shows you watch, don’t read them. That’s what everybody always says to me. If I dont’ like a comment, it’s my fault for having read it in the first place.
So I will continue to watch this poorly written and poorly acted zombie show, and continue to talk about it. You’ll have to just avoid me.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:29 AM
Merle had a few groovy pick-up lines for Andrea on the rooftop. I believe “bumpin uglies” was used.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:29 AM
this.
we talked about that last week too.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:30 AM
I haven’t watched this week’s episode yet but I was under the impression she was banging the best friend before he was in a coma. There was a reference to them having problems in their marriage at the beginning of the first episode.
you should watch. They pretty much turn that on its ear.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:30 AM
So now we’re assuming the zombies don’t respond well to the cold? How did you come to that conclusion?
November 24th, 2010 at 11:30 AM
That will be a present To: NDub, From: NDub for Christmas, thanks to your recommendation.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:30 AM
I do like how they started the show with the guy knee deep in the zombie apocalypse, but I do hope they go deeper into what caused it and where it started and maybe get to how wide spread it is.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:31 AM
That is what I thought too.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:31 AM
So now we’re assuming the zombies don’t respond well to the cold? How did you come to that conclusion?
See comment #74.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
That’s something they’ll have to touch on to keep the show going for at least another season or two.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
I thought people had come to a conclusion that the World War Z world of Zombies was the best place to set up the “how to survive the Zombie Apocalypse” game
November 24th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
Listen, I’m not taking World War Z as the definitive know-all on the zombie apocalypse. I prefer to consider many different options and come up with my own plan based on many ideas.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
first off, does world war z say how the zombies at the bottom of the ocean could survive the water pressure? they’d be crushed.
fuck that noise. plus, they’d be slow moving in the ocean and easily stopped by a net or barrier.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
fuck that noise. plus, they’d be slow moving in the ocean and easily stopped by a net or barrier.
the minute your food fishing net hauls in a zombie barracuda, or a zombie portuguese man-0-war, its all over for your ocean paradise.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
I’ll never underestimate zombies, but I think water would be a nice way to get away from them. While their drive is infinite, they’re pace is slow and mostly clumsy. There’s no way they could swim.
But World War of Z would be a nice read to explain to me how they could do some damage in the water.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:36 AM
So now we’re assuming the zombies don’t respond well to the cold?
Further to that point.
In the freezing cold you don’t move that fast you find that it’s harder to move as your body, muscles, and bones stiffen. People don’t freeze quickly because our bodies give off heat.
Since zombeis are undead, they don’t give off heat, so at -20 and below, the zombies would likely freeze completely.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:37 AM
Yeah not to mention we’d have to believe the zombies could magically figure out how to breathe in water (which seems unlikely as they’re walking around with a virus that makes them walk slower than normal and prevents them from thinking and talking).
November 24th, 2010 at 11:38 AM
Yeah not to mention we’d have to believe the zombies could magically figure out how to breathe in water
SG – zombies don’t breathe.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:39 AM
zombies don’t breathe. Zombies are dead. Actors who portray zombies breathe, but only because they aren’t actually zombies.
But zombies don’t need oxygen to stay dead. They don’t breathe.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:39 AM
this isn’t a fishing net. fuck that noise…im going vegetarian and getting protein from raided GNC’s.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:40 AM
zombies don’t breathe but they’re still subject to water pressure.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:41 AM
Wait just a god damn second. You’re now telling me every living creature can get infected with the same virus that created human zombies? Sorry, not happening. Human viruses are 100% different than other viruses in animals. Especially non-mammals. You get the fuck outta here with that shit.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:41 AM
People probably don’t act normal while they’re clinging to humanity and sanity.
like in the book version of The mist, when the guy fucks the lady in the grocery sstore, not entirely sure his wife and her husband are dead
November 24th, 2010 at 11:42 AM
spencer enjoys his Muscle Milk.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:42 AM
One thing you have to do is cover up your body in armor. If you have to venture out and scavenge and so forth, you need to protect your skin from bites. I’d be up in the kevlar and such.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:49 AM
Their ability to deal with water pressure is an issue. The rate of decomposition underwater may mean weeks/months before the zombie is too degraded to be mobile.
Another concern would be floaters which depends on a few factors as well. The freshly dead and decaying would float due to fat and gas from decomposing intestines, however once the gas is vented and the fat has become dissolved the body would promptly sink.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:51 AM
zombies don’t breathe but they’re still subject to water pressure.
wrong. They don’t have oxygenated blood or air in their lungs to be crushed. Sorry.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:52 AM
Wait just a god damn second. You’re now telling me every living creature can get infected with the same virus that created human zombies? Sorry, not happening. Human viruses are 100% different than other viruses in animals. Especially non-mammals. You get the fuck outta here with that shit.
hi. Bird Flu? Bubonic plague? Aids? Leukemia? Cancer? Animals get all that shit (although sharks don’t get cancer). But seriously, you must have heard of Bird flu.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:56 AM
For the record, I don’t think there would be instances of zombified animals.
November 24th, 2010 at 11:59 AM
There are VIRUSES that can be carried by other animals that affect humans but they do not affect every living creature (like fish, reptiles, and other mammals). Also, bubonic plague is a bacterial infection. Viruses and bacterial infections are totally different.